Gravity vs. Lightness of Being

Humans are Source energy made flesh. 

Source energy flows to us, and is meant to flow through us, and back into our world. If we resist the flow, the energy becomes stuck and gets heavy, weighing down our physical form.  Recently my journal wondered, “What if gravity is an accumulation of stagnant energy?  What if our resistance to ‘go with the flow’ is what weighs us down, and holds us back from fulfilling our purpose in life?”  

We all know older people who seem more affected by gravity than their younger counterparts.  They don’t lift their limbs as high, and they move more slowly, as if their body is heavier.  They even get shorter, drawn closer to the earth.  Then there are octogenarians who seem less affected by gravity, and are lively, vibrant, full of energy, and active until their last breath. In my observation the second set often have very positive, relaxed attitudes, and seem more accepting, and willing to go with the flow than the less flexible individuals in the first set.

Let it go!

Energy wants to flow.  When we flow energy we feel alive and vibrant.  When we resist the energy, it feels like gravity pulls harder against us.  Our energy becomes depressed and we may feel stuck.

Have you ever had a really BIG worry that became suddenly resolved?  Do you remember the feeling of lightness that came over you with that solution?  I know what a huge relief I feel when I am able to let go of thoughts that don’t feel good.  It’s as if we release the energy we have been resisting in the same way a damn suddenly releases water it has been resisting.  Imagine how much less stress the damn wall suddenly feels!  Or how about when we finally let ourselves break down and cry over something for which we have been holding back tears? 

We always feel lighter once we let go.  Imagine the buoyancy then –  the relief  that comes – when we set down all of the resistance we have accumulated over a lifetime! 

I’m talking about the transition we call death as being a buoyant experience.  The transition from our physical body back into non-physical, pure, positive energy must be the most buoyant feeling!  Buoyant like a beach ball rocketing to the surface when we finally release it from under water.  

That is what Death is – a releasing of all the weighted worry of this world, to instantly ascend into worthiness, joy, and unconditional love.  Our Ascension from physical form to non-physical formlessness is powerful and instant, like a cork exiting a champagne bottle.  

We let go, and we ascend.

There Is No Death. We are eternal beings. We are One energy. We are connected always to Source. 

When we feel as if we are separated from Source we feel pain, so our purpose becomes to find ways to release resistance, and ascend back toward our Source (unconditional Love).  We actually come here to practice that ascension, that return to Love. 

We LIKE the way it feels when we release, relax, and return to the flow of unconditional Love. Each time we release our resistance to something, we bounce back toward our Source. Life is a process of moving away from, and back toward Source energy, and our emotions are a gauge to show us where we are in relation to that energy of unconditional love.

We do not die. 

That simple thought releases a lot of resistance for a lot of people.  Life does not end, we simply ascend.  We ascend to pure positive energy, and then later we decide to come back into human form for one reason. We like the way it feels to ascend from a state of resisting the flow of life force energy, into a state of freely flowing life force energy.

So if you feel heavy, like something is weighing you down, play with letting that shit go! 

Play with letting go just to see what it feels like. How much do you feel yourself rise back toward the Love at our core? We are here to enjoy ascension, so play with it and have fun!

Grow on!

Are we practicing being light or heavy?
How much are we practicing going with the flow?
How much are we practicing ascension?
How much are we resisting life force?
How can we lean more toward unconditional Love?
What is it you are ready to release right now?
What is it you are ready to be ready to release?

Emotions ~ What the fuck are they, and why do they feel the way they feel?

Emotions are energy in motion. Human beings are energy flowers. 
In this context, flower means one who flows energy (flow-er), but I love the image of us as energy flowers!

Pascal Debrunner-unsplash

In simplest terms, emotions indicate which direction we are flowing our energy: toward Source, or away from Source.  The frequency of Source energy is unconditional love.  Source energy (unconditional love) is at the core of every human, emanating from us, and calling to us.

Our emotions tell us if we are moving toward, or away from, that unconditional love!  Pretty cool, right?

When we experience high-vibe emotions like joy, love, passion, or appreciation, we feel great!  These emotions resonate with our natural frequency, feel happy in our body, and may cause a lightness in our heart and mind.  We sometimes describe it as feeling like all is right in our world.

Unconditional love resonates with humans because that’s what we are!  Source is unconditional love, and we are made of Source energy, so of course high-vibe emotions feel right and familiar.

When we experience low-vibe emotions like insecurity, unworthiness, depression, powerlessness or toxic-shame, we kinda feel like shit, right?

The reason these emotions feel crappy in our body is because they do NOT resonate with the unconditional love at our core.  Low-vibe emotions feel discordant, jagged, heavy, and uncomfortable because they are a completely different frequency than the Source energy at our core.

When we find ourselves experiencing shitty feeling emotions, it only ever means one thing: we are thinking in a way that Source would NEVER think.  We are thinking unloving thoughts about ourselves or others.  Source energy does NOT see us (or anyone) as unworthy, unloveable, or powerless. Not ever. 

Source sees us in every moment as the lovable, worthy, all-powerful, joyful beings that we are!

So Source stands at our core KNOWING the truth of who we are, flowing through us and feeling amazing.  When we are loving ourselves, we feel great because we are in vibrational alignment with our soul.  When we are doubting ourselves, or thinking hateful thoughts, it feels OFF, because it is out of alignment with the truth of who we are.

Sometimes when we experience heavier vibrations, we get stuck.  When we think enough thoughts that feel unworthy, unlovable, and powerless, we can begin to believe that we are unworthy, unlovable, and powerless, instead of understanding that these are simply signposts showing us that we are thinking thoughts that are moving us away from our true vibration.

So when we feel crappy, NOTHING has gone wrong! It does NOT mean that we are crappy, or have failed in any way. It does not mean we are stuck here and will always feel crappy. It’s simply a sign that we are, in that moment, flowing energy away from the alignment that feels good.

Once we recognize the signs – physical sensations we feel in our body – we can choose to pivot back toward unconditional love.  Then we can move toward alignment with our natural frequency again where we feel great.

Our emotions are signposts. They show us where we are going by feeling happy or crappy.  Then we get to choose to keep going, or course-correct. Doesn’t it sound FUN to practice better feeling, high-vibe emotions that align us with love, joy, abundance, health, and vibrant energy?!

Grow on!

What signs are your emotions giving you?
How do you feel about that?
How much do you like the emotional direction you are traveling?
How quickly are you able to pivot when you want to? This takes practice, so let’s be gentle with ourselves while learning this new skill!


If you want to learn more about identifying and following your own emotional signposts, or learn how to shift emotional direction, coaching can help.

To find out if I am the right coach for you, click HERE, then check “chat with Cyndi” and click “continue” to schedule a date/time that work for you. It’s free, and you’ll walk away with at least one action to move you in any direction you want to go!

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Who are We?

How do you define yourself?  

Humans define ourselves in many ways.  We are daughters and sons.  We are siblings and parents. We are ‘our career’ (I am a nurse, teacher, ditch digger) or ‘how we spend our time’ (lazy, productive, creative).
We are caregivers and mentors.  We are exhausted or exuberant.
We define ourselves sometimes as sad, anxious, angry, happy, hopeful, content, or the entire rainbow that falls between shame and pure joy.

But this is not Who we are.  These words describe what we are, or how we are in the moment.  We cannot ‘be’ our emotion.  We experience our emotions, we do not ‘be’ them.

When we define ourselves by these descriptors, what happens when the descriptor no longer applies?  Often women have self-defined as “mother” for decades.  What happens when all the babies leave home?  If you have defined yourself by your career, what happens after retirement?  If you define yourself as wife and homemaker – adore that role, lean into it, and are passionate about it – what happens if the spouse wants a divorce, or departs this earthly plane?

If we feel defined by one of our roles, and that role shifts, does that change who we are?  Of course not!  So if we are not defined by our roles, or how we feel emotionally, then fundamentally speaking: Who are we?  Who are you?  

How do we answer that existential question, “Who am I?”

At our core, we are all One, Source energy, Spirit, God.

This is Truth.

When we remember this Truth we FEEL our connection, we are in the flow – literally flowing Source energy, Spirit, God.  We naturally feel confident, secure, passionate, and joyful.

When we become disconnected from this Truth, (or forget temporarily, which is the human way) our energy plummets because we are no longer flowing as much Source energy.  Our energy can become stagnant and depressed if we do not renew the connection.

If we do not believe – or have never been taught – that we are God/Source energy at our core, the disconnection we feel can leave us anxious, fearful, confused, insecure, and dependent on other people for a sense of validation.  If we depend on others to meet our needs, we can easily become resentful if they don’t fill that role because we haven’t learned to turn inward for love and guidance.

Love and guidance are always ours!

When we remember the Truth of who we are, we can learn to listen for, and trust our inner voice, the voice in our heart, the voice of God.  Tuning to our own inner wisdom clears up confusion.  When we try to follow the wisdom of others, confusion ensues because each of those others may have very different ideas about what is right for us.  And MANY of the people around us are disconnected from the Source at our core, which means their ideas of what is right or wrong can come from fear instead of unconditional love.

Lisa Miller PHD, Founder and Director of the Spirituality Mind Body Institute at Columbia University, and author of The Awakened Brain, does a brilliant job reminding us that we are loved, held, guided, and never alone.  She makes a strong case that spiritual disconnection is the biggest challenge facing our youth today, in this two-hour episode of the Rich Roll podcast. It’s long but well worth our time.

When others try to guide our lives, tell us what to do, or make our choices for us, they teach us that there will always be someone there to tell us what to do, someone wiser than us.  Of course we didn’t learn to turn inward for guidance!  Of course we feel adrift when left on our own! 

If we’ve always had someone else steering our course, how on earth do we decide where to go when they are no longer here to guide us, and no one told us we had infinite wisdom inside us?  How can we possibly trust ourselves to make decisions if we have never grown confidence in this skill?

Won’t it be a lovely gift to give our children (siblings, partners, employees) when we instill in them confidence in their own power?!  Let’s teach them they are connected to Source energy always!  Let’s remind ourselves and everyone that we are each loved, held, and guided always, and that to access infinite wisdom at our core, all we need do is turn inward, and listen!

Grow on!

How much does it resonate for you that you are Source energy having a human experience?  Try saying the following affirmations aloud and see how they feel when you say them:

I am pure spirit.
I am eternal light.
I am Source Energy.
I am God in human form.
I am Divine.
I have access to all I need to know, inside me.

If one or more of these resonate for you, play with saying them several times a day to see what it does for your energy!

If none of these resonate for you, ask yourself how often you feel joyful, resilient, and full of vibrant energy? 
What will change for you when you trust your inner voice? 
What’s it worth to feel confident, worthy, calm, trusting, and joyful?
What’s holding you back?
What will it take to get over that block?


Sometimes coaching can help us get passed that stuck energy. If you’d like to find out if I am the right coach to help you move forward, schedule a free chat at this link to find out!

Seven Levels of Energy

Mastering your Mind during COVID 19

Life is energy. 

Humans are energy.  Our bodies are energy systems.  We are literally made out of flowing energy!  Often when I introduce this concept to clients, they ask questions like, “Well if I am made of energy, why am I so TIRED all the time?”  That’s a GREAT question that really gets to the root of how I help my clients with energy coaching!

There are two types of energy available to us: Catabolic & Anabolic.

Catabolic Energy ~

Catabolic energy is destructive, draining, and stressful on our bodies, our emotions, and our mental capacity.  Catabolic energy is crucial in life-threatening situations because it’s the energy that allows us to fight, flee, or freeze.  Catabolic emotions include guilt, shame, fear, anxiety, worry, hostility, resentment, frustration, loathing, condemnation, blame, and judgment, to name a few.  Catabolic emotions feel hard, and challenging.  They create stress hormones that deplete us of energy, lower our immune system, and impede the optimal function of our mind and body.

Anabolic Energy ~

Anabolic energy is constructive, healing, fueling, and growth-oriented.  Anabolic energy strengthens and energizes us with long-term use.  Anabolic energy includes emotions such as love, forgiveness, compassion, peace, joy, passion, and so many more.  Anabolic emotions feel good.  They cause our brain to create feel-good hormones, and they naturally promote healing, and wellbeing.

We have Seven Levels of Energy Available

According to Bruce Schneider,* there are seven levels of energy presentation, each made up of varying degrees of catabolic and anabolic energies.  In the chart below, we see that the highest levels of energy are anabolic and the lowest levels are catabolic.

Image courtesy of BSM Consulting

So while every energy level has both advantages and disadvantages, it correlates that the more time we spend in those higher vibrations, the more energy we have.

Nobody is just one energy level all the time.  We each have a unique energy profile made up of all seven levels with primary and secondary levels that we choose to use most of the time under typical circumstances.  It should come as no surprise that our energy profile changes under stress. 

Energy Overview

Below is a brief look at the seven levels of energy, and possible thoughts that someone might be thinking about pandemic circumstances in each level.  If you would like to learn more about these concepts, check out Bruce Schneider’s book, Energy Leadership, or contact an iPEC certified energy coach.

Energy Level 1 ~

This is the most catabolic energy level, so we end up with the least amount of energy left to “spend” on anything.

Core Emotions – apathy, shame, guilt, anxiety, self-doubt, worry, fear, embarrassment, hopelessness, depression

Possible Thoughts about the pandemic – 
The economy will never recover! 
My finances are ruined! 
There is no way I can possibly come out better at the other end of this. 
I’m too old to start over again! 
How will I feed my family? 
What if I catch the virus?! 
What if someone I love dies?
What if I do something wrong and someone I love dies because of me?
What if they never find a cure? 
How will I possibly survive? 
My career is over. 
I’ve lost everything. 
Everything was going really well for me, and then the pandemic ruined everything I’ve worked for. 
Circumstances have crippled me. 
I’m trapped!

Energy Level 2 ~

Core Emotions – anger, greed, resentment, blame, judgment, antagonism, struggle, frustration, irritation, hatred, pride

Possible Thoughts about the pandemic – 
I am very aware of all that could go wrong and I have to be on guard against it.
Why isn’t the government doing more? 
Why did they wait so long to act? 
Why don’t people act right and follow orders? 
Why should I follow orders? 
They are NOT going to tell me what to do. 
Why is this so hard? 
How can I profit from this? 
What’s in this for me? 
I’m doing everything I am supposed to and I’ll probably get sick because someone else didn’t do what they were supposed to! 
This is the government’s fault. 
This is China’s fault. 
Whose fault is this? 
What a shitty period of history to live. 
Fuck coronavirus!

Energy Level 3 ~

Core Emotions – forgiveness, rationalization, justification, tolerance, relief

Possible Thoughts about the pandemic –
I’m doing the best I can. 
I hope everyone will take care of themselves, I certainly am. 
I can find ways to get through this. 
I’m a survivor. 
I’ll be fine. 
Those in charge are doing the best they can. 
I can tolerate whatever is needed to get to the other side of this disaster. 
I’ll be fine. 
I’ll find a way to pull through. 
I can cope with anything.  

Energy Level 4 ~

Core Emotions – compassion, caring, generosity, gratitude, love

Possible Thoughts about the pandemic –
What can I do to help? 
Who most needs my support? 
We must do everything we can to help people. 
We must work together to stop the virus. 
I must make people see how important this is! 
Why are they not taking every precaution? 
Why are they bucking the guidelines? 
I’m not bucking guidelines.
We are all in this together! 
We can only get through this if we all do our part. 
Why isn’t the government doing more to support the most vulnerable? 
I can start a movement to help people! 
I feel so depleted.

Energy Level 5 ~

Core Emotions – peace, harmony, stability

Possible Thoughts about the pandemic –
What if the virus is here to help us?
This is the perfect time to take some online classes and change careers. 
This is a great opportunity for each of us to examine where we are, and what we want to create next! 
How wonderful that we are finding innovative ways to work from home. 
This can lead to reduced traffic in the long run. 
It’s the perfect opportunity to identify weak spots in our systems, and create solutions to strengthen them. 
I can’t work where I was getting my income, so I am going to use my gifts to create other revenue streams. 
The pandemic slowed my momentum, so I will flow my momentum in a different direction. 
The overall impact of this will be abundantly beneficial for all of us.

Energy Level 6 ~

Core Emotions – joy, hope, eagerness

Possible Thoughts about the pandemic –
I have been feeling so happy. 
What an incredible time to be alive! 
Restaurants are thriving doing more business in take out than they ever did with seated guests. 
People are leaving notes of gratitude for essential workers. 
People have more time to spend with their families. 
We’re finding more balance between careers and personal fulfillment.  
There is a sense of joy and camaraderie as I move through my day.
People are happy and helping each other. 
It feels as if social distancing has brought us vibrationally closer to Source and to each other. 
There is good news everywhere of people making full recoveries, of companies innovating supply chains, and creating new ways to connect and work from home, of our environment healing, of our air and water becoming clearer.  Countries once at trade war are now collaborating to ensure the flow of medical supplies. 
Researchers across the world are working together to create vaccines.
I know that something wonderful is happening. 
Everything is working out for our highest good. 

Energy Level 7 ~

We dip into this level of energy during meditation, and spiritual connection.  For most of us, it’s a level where we recharge our batteries, not a permanent place from which to live.

Core Emotions – absolute passion, unconditional love, ecstasy

Possible Thoughts  do NOT include the pandemic –
I am.  We are.  Everyone is.  All is well.  

Takeaway tip:

Try leaning into the thoughts for each energy level above.  We can clearly feel the difference in vibration, the difference in emotion, the difference in energy that comes at each energy level. None of the levels is bad or good.Which one feels the way you want to feel?

Wondering how much of each level you currently embody?

sample ELI report

The Energy Leadership Index (ELI) assessment is a tool that measures our unique energy profile.  Through a series of 84 questions, the ELI reveals the percentage of each of the energy levels you experience under “normal” circumstances, and also how your energy shows up under stress.  Your Average Resonating Level of Energy (A.R.L.) represents your average energy presentation, under normal circumstances and under stress.

You can master your own energy and transform your life.

With the awareness and insights gained through the ELI & the ELI explanation session that follows, clients discover opportunities to align energy with their own goals, boost creativity, elevate communications, and increase overall satisfaction in any aspect of their lives. 

Once a person identifies their personal energy drains, they can choose to make adjustments that allow them to overcome their blocks, reclaim that energy, and focus it on what’s really important to them.  A study by the International Coach Federation shows that clients who apply this knowledge with the help of a certified professional coach begin to see sustainable transformations in health & wellness, relationships, confidence, finances, and more.

Source: International Coach Federation

Every change begins with awareness of what is.  If you are interested in becoming aware of your current energy patterns, I would LOVE to chat with you! I can schedule your ELI assessment to get you started on your path toward a more energized life!

Higher levels of satisfaction await.
Power, purpose, and passion await. 
More joy and fulfillment await.
What are you waiting for? 

Grow on!

What energy levels do you practice on a regular basis?
What energy level feels best when you try it on? 
What will change for you when you master your energy? 
What changes will you create in your life when you master your energy?


*The Energy Leadership Index Assessment, seven levels of energy, and the Energetic Self Perception Chart were developed by Bruce Schneider, PHD.  Bruce is the founder of the Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching where I received my life-altering coach training.

Boost Your Immunity by Getting Engaged!

Everyone is currently talking about the importance of a healthy immune system, and I could not agree MORE!

We’ve heard reminders about the importance of proper hydration, plenty of rest, washing our hands, eating healthy foods, – avoid crap food because if your body is already struggling with garbage and toxins, it has less strength to fight off viruses – drinking less alcohol, reducing smoking, washing our hands, staying active, taking probiotics, getting some sunshine every day, and then washing our hands again.

All of these things are GREAT to boost immunity, plus they help us feel healthier & more energized! One thing I have not heard mentioned in this torrent of common sense is to get engaged! 

Human beings are energy systems. 

We literally exist to flow energy.  When our energy is not flowing it is stagnant, and our energy system feels depressed.  Stuck energy causes physical dis-ease, and once we stop flowing energy, our Spirit disengages from our physical body and we have our ‘death’ experience.  – According to Abraham, we never die.  We are eternal beings and when we ‘die’ we still exist as non-physical energy that is 100% engaged in all the same subjects of interest we had while in physical form.

The only way to flow energy is to engage energy.

So get engaged!  Find something that you are passionate about and focus on that.  That’s what flows energy and sustains our Spirit.  Boredom will kill us!  Boredom stagnates our energy and energy needs to flow.

So besides following all of the wonderful common sense advice to eat right, get plenty of rest, and wash your hands repeatedly, get excited about your life!  If we’re not feeling passionate about SOMETHING, we are an easy target  for that energy transference known as ‘death’ that so many people fear.  

If we are sleepwalking through life, going to work, surviving the mental clutter in our mind, emotionally drained, tolerating relationships, physically inactive, and spiritually unanchored, then we are NOT energetically engaged!  Washing our hands a million times can’t boost our immune system enough to counteract this level of energy stagnation.

When we stop flowing energy in this physical body, when we stop being engaged in our current life, we are as likely to die in our sleep or in a freak accident as to be taken out by a viral pandemic.

More than one client this week has expressed a fear of dying, and anyone watching TV, or surfing the internet these days might resonate with that fear.

Fear of death might mean that we do not understand our eternal, infinite nature.  But my intuition tells me that most people are afraid to die because there is something the heart longs to do that is yet undone.  THAT is where passion lies!  Focus on THAT because it will flow energy and feed your resilience, and expand your soul.

Many clients have told me they don’t know what THAT is for them, so they get discouraged.  I say let that encourage you!  If your fear of death is telling you there is MORE yet to be done, that your purpose is not yet fulfilled, then allow that knowing to fill you with HOPE!  Not hope simply that death will not yet come for you, but hope that you have purpose and your purpose will again engage and flow energy through this life.  And flowing energy is the purpose.  Of all life.

So go get engaged!  Find your passion and flow with it.

Flow on!

What do you enjoy? 
Find ways to incorporate it into your life as soon & as often as possible.

If you do not know what you enjoy, it’s very possible that until now, others have defined your life for you.  If this is true for you, I encourage you not to be too hard on yourself, because it is true for MANY people.  It’s quite common to let our parents, our spouse, our children, or our career define “who” we are.  But when their version of who we ‘should be’ no longer inspires us, or when the outside influence goes away, we may not know what we truly want or where to flow our energy.

Try doing something differently than you normally do it. Do you enjoy that? Do it again! Not so much? Forget about that experiment and try something different.

Enjoy it? Keep it. Do it again.
Not so much? Move on to experiment with a new experience.

The important thing is to get that energy flowing.
You’ll figure it out as you go. You’ve GOT this.

Here are a few options to engage energy and get it flowing: 

Physical activity to move or unstick physical energy.
Journal to unstick mental/emotional energy & gain clarity.
See a therapist to unstick old emotional energy.
Hire a coach to help identify and remove energy blocks.
Plan activities with friends or family to engage social energy.
Reduce exposure to toxic people to move stuck energy.
Be of service to others to engage social and spiritual energies.
Take self-maintenance seriously to engage spiritual energy.
Meditate or connect with nature to move spiritual energy. 
Read spiritually uplifting books or blogs.
Clean home and office to move energy in your environment.

What’s YOUR favorite way to engage energy or get unstuck?
Please share in the comments!

Fear vs. Faith

Before electric lights and heaters, the long, cold dark of winter practically knit itself into endlessness at winter solstice.  People had to face the dark with fear or with faith.  Winter holy days began being celebrated to bolster our faith in the darkest part of the year, and celebrate the return of the light.  This holiday season, celebrate the return of lightness to your heart!

Fear and faith cannot exist at the same moment because one supplants the other.  So which one do you choose on the regular?

Whichever one you have practiced becomes the vibration that comes naturally.  One reason people seek a life coach is because they have been living in a vibration of fear for the most part, and are ready to trade that vibration for one that feels better.  Worry, doubt, judgement, overwhelm, anxiety, perfectionism, control issues, resentment.  All of these stem from fear.  

I am NOT saying that there is anything wrong with these feelings.  All of them are completely normal for human beings.  What I am saying is that when people experience more of these fear-based emotions than faith-based emotions, it feels pretty crummy.  Some people decide they WANT to feel better than crummy.  Some people get overwhelmed by the slew of negative emotions that keep attracting more fear-based thoughts that bring more icky-feeling emotions.

It is NOT my job (nor my desire) as a coach to tell people that they shouldn’t be having these emotions – quite the contrary!  Emotions are our internal guidance system like our GPS and exist to give us a signal.  All emotions are valid human experiences.  No emotion is “bad.”  It is simply a signal.  Emotions signal to us how we are thinking.  When we think thoughts that do not serve us, and drain our energy – we get a signal in the form of negative emotion.  The signal simply says, “you are having thoughts that drain your energy.”  What a person chooses to DO with that signal (emotion) is completely up to them.

Some people beat themselves up for experiencing negative emotions because they have gotten the idea somehow that negative emotions are bad, and by extension, they are bad for having them.  Nothing could be further from the truth.  

You are not your emotions. 

If you feel angry about something – NORMAL!  If you feel sad about something – NORMAL!  As a life coach, I never try to talk anyone out of experiencing an emotion.  I’m not asking clients to act happy when they do not feel happy.  Coaching is not about ignoring bad-feeling emotions or squashing them down, or sweeping them under the rug, or pretending you don’t have them. Own your emotions!  If you feel sad, it’s totally fine (and healthy) to admit it.  Say it out loud.  “I feel sad.” “I feel angry.”  If you are a human being, then it’s understandable that you WILL experience these emotions sometimes.

The emotions that come up for a person are the emotions that come up.  We cannot control our emotions.  But it is incredibly important to learn how to MANAGE our emotions if we want to exist with other human beings who also have emotions.  Again, this does NOT mean denying the emotion or burying it so as not to ruffle someone’s feathers, because THEIR emotions are THEIR job to manage, and NOT your responsibility.

Managing our emotions means that we allow ourselves to feel the emotion, but we don’t allow our emotions to define us or to spill over onto others.  For example: Experiencing sadness is completely normal & healthy for humans.  Being sad, or becoming sadness, or letting sadness “be” who you are is not normal & healthy.  If someone gets to a point where they feel sadness is a defining characteristic of their life, it will be very helpful to explore this with a therapist or counselor.

Letting the emotions spill over onto others is also a sign that the emotion is taking over, and not being managed.  In other words feeling angry is a normal part of life.  Yelling at others because you feel angry is not.  It means the anger is controlling you, and not the other way round. Again, it will be very helpful to explore this with a therapist or counselor.

Now, some people are going to think that it’s OK to yell at someone if they “made me angry.”  While it may appear that way on the surface, that’s not really what happened.  

When someone says or does something, that something is NOT causing your anger.  The “something” is neutral until you assign it meaning.  And here’s the really cool thing – you can assign any meaning you want!  The way that we assign meaning is by telling ourselves a story about the “something.”  

For example: You spot a friend on a busy street and wave.  You are sure she saw you but she did not wave back.

What does this mean?  Nothing.  But usually the mind will create a story to give it meaning.  And the type of meaning assigned is going to be based on the kinds of thoughts you think on a regular basis.  

If someone tends to have a lot of negative (fear-based) thoughts about others, or (fear-based) thoughts of inadequacy about themselves, the story the mind tells might be something like one of these: “Well she was rude!  How dare she ignore me!” “I know she saw me, why didn’t she wave?  Maybe she’s not really my friend or maybe she heard about what happened the other day!” “What if she doesn’t like me anymore?”  “Well she’s obviously not my friend.  I guess I can delete her number.”

If someone tends toward more positive (faith-based) thoughts, the story the mind tells might be something more like one of these: “Wow she must have been really distracted to not even see me here!”  “We’ll have a good laugh next time we talk when I tell her I saw her but she didn’t see me!”  

Nothing has meaning until the human brain attaches a story to it, so pick your stories wisely so instead of depleting your energy, and leaving you full of fear or worry, they add value to your life & build your faith!

Fear-based thoughts drain energy.  Faith-based thoughts boost your energy, or at least don’t diminish your energy.  And you get to choose!  If you tend toward a habit of fear-based thinking, you may find your energy depleted a LOT. 

It takes practice to retrain your brain, but reclaiming your energy is worth the try!

Grow on!

What fear-based thoughts are you entertaining?
How do they affect your energy?
What faith-based thoughts come easily?
What affect do these have on your energy?
What will change for you when you shift to more faith-based thinking?

Positively Uplifting!

Recently a client asked,

“I’ve never tried positive affirmations, and am not sure how that really works. Is it telling yourself positive things while looking at yourself in a mirror? Or is that just a movie cliche?” GREAT question! Thanks so much for asking.

Positive affirmations are powerful tools to help build new neural pathways. In other words, they can help us rewire our brains. Practicing affirmations helps challenge and overcome self-sabotaging, and negative thoughts.

Sometimes the biggest obstacle to getting what we really want is the thoughts we are thinking. Energy attracts like energy, so thoughts attract more thoughts like themselves.

When we chronically have fear-filled thoughts, more fearful thoughts come easily. When we chronically choose thoughts that feel good when we think them, more thoughts like that come easily to us.

We’ve spent a LOT of times thinking our usual thoughts and creating well-worn pathways to more of those thoughts. If we become aware that our thoughts are not serving us and want to change them, it takes practice.

Practice thoughts that feel good!

Choose affirmations that feel good when you say them.

If you say, “Money comes easily to me,” when you are over your head in debt, it’s highly likely that you’ll get a knot in the pit of your stomach that tells you that the thought you are thinking is WRONG. And that’s when something like, “Money is hard to come by,” pops into your head. And that energy attracts more thoughts like that one. So, “money comes easily to me,” might not be the right affirmation.

How does this one resonate?

This feels more true for most people. There is no contradiction here. Now when a habitual thought pops up like, “I don’t have enough,” remind yourself of the NEW thought you are choosing. Tell yourself that the old thought may have been true in the past, but you are now open to receive floods of financial abundance with ease. Repeating the phrase often helps build a new path to better feeling thoughts.

Here is another amazing affirmation that I found in Tosha Silver‘s BRILLIANT book, It’s Not Your Money: How to Live Fully from Divine Abundance. I highly recommend this book to everyone, especially if you are feeling financially challenged!

This affirmation in prayer form felt AMAZING to me when I read it and each time I read it now, something opens in me, and I truly feel more ready to receive all the abundance the Universe wants to deliver!

If an affirmation really resonates, practice it! Write it on sticky notes to remind yourself. Repeat it like a mantra in the shower, or while sitting in traffic.

Some affirmations feed your soul for awhile and then get replaced with others that feel even better or resonate more.

And sometimes an affirmation that does not feel good in one circumstance feels amazing later on. For this reason, I hang on to affirmations with which I would like to resonate, and try them again when my energy is different!

This affirmation does not resonate with many of us. My first reaction to it was, “I wish!” If I had tried using this affirmation then, I would have attracted thoughts that confirmed I was NOT any of these things. But I really WANTED to feel that way about myself, so I hung on to the words for later. Now the words resonate for me on days I am feeling fully confident, not always, but so much more now than before! I choose to fully practice this thought when I am feeling confident and it is resonating. Why?

Because what we think determines how we feel, and the way we feel is the energy that we send out into the Universe. And what we send out in the Universe is what the Universe sends back to us.

Looking yourself in the eyes can help.

If someone won’t look you in the eyes when they talk to you, how much do you trust what they say? Looking yourself in the eyes and telling yourself Truth can help you accept it as true for you, while acting as a powerful reminder. Many people do not see themselves as worthy of self-care even though they might invest huge amounts of energy caring for others. Looking in the mirror to repeat this reminder can be very helpful.

“I am…”

Affirmations that begin with “I am,” are powerful and can be more powerful if you look into your eyes in the mirror while you say them. But if you are not yet comfortable looking at yourself in the eyes, then do it anyway! Look deep into your own eyes and remind yourself of the Truth:

I am worthy of self care.
I am worthy of the same abundant love I offer others.
I am choosing the thoughts I think.
I am an extension of Source energy.
I am valued just for being me.
Life is a process and I am right where I am supposed to be.
I am learning.
I am becoming.

Make a list of your strengths and put “I am” in front of them!

I am kind.
I am caring.
I am loyal.
I am honest.
I am a good friend.

You get the idea.

Create ones that serve your needs.

One of my clients had repeating thought patterns that constantly told her she had screwed things up again, or that she was about to screw things up BIG time! Her affirmation took a while to create, practice, and to resonate fully, but now she says it’s one of the most powerful tools in her toolbox!

It does NOT mean that everything in her life always goes the way she wants, or has planned. It simply means that when things get off track, it doesn’t feel like the end of the world anymore. There is tremendous value in the peace of mind this can bring.

Do NOT practice when you feel bad!

Do not practice affirming if you are hungry, angry, lonely, tired or your energy is otherwise depressed. If you practice saying, “I am a powerful being fueled by Source energy,” when you feel crappy, you attract more of what feels crappy because you don’t (at that moment) feel powerful or fueled by Source.

So, what to do? When you feel crappy is when you really NEED to change those thoughts if your goal is to feel better. What can you affirm in those more challenging moments to shift your energy in the direction of beginning to feel better?

Esther Hicks and Abraham urge us to “go general.” So instead of thinking about the specific problem/solution, focus on general thoughts that feel better than the current stress-inducing ones you are entertaining.

My Inspirations

I just want to give credit where credit is due. Most of my affirmations and my wisdom around positive thoughts and how they affect us have come to me through the work of Esther Hicks, Jill Lebeau, and Tosha Silver. I am eternally filled with overflowing appreciation for these women.

The power is in your thoughts.

You will find affirmations everywhere. Google “positive affirmations’ and you’ll get a million. Here are all of my favorites printed on beautiful photos to help them raise my vibration and stick in my mind easier.

All of my free images can be seen and downloaded here: 
The Art of Positive Thinking

I have over 500, so here is a link to each individual category:
Health & Wellness
Prosperity & Abundance
Inspired by Abraham
Raise Your Vibration
Self-Esteem
Self-Empowerment
Soothe Your Spirit

Where on earth do I begin?: Hello world!

Where on earth do I begin?  

I want the reader to understand that I am walking a path toward my own healing.  I am still learning and absolutely have not figured out all the answers, or any answers at all.  I do not claim to be an expert in anything.  The most I can offer is what I have learned to be true for me along the twisted journey that is my beautiful life.  

For many years, I felt the enormous weight of my existence, as if I were made of lead, or something heavier.  Something inside was telling me I was born to fly, while the evidence around me strongly suggested that flying was generally discouraged.  The biggest challenge I am still trying to overcome is the long-ago instilled belief that I cannot fly, that I am not meant to fly, that nobody ever really flies.  

I’m talking about flying high and feeling great about life.  I’m talking about feeling fulfilled, satisfied, and happy instead of weary, wary and worn.

Most of us rarely schedule time to kindle spiritual growth, or even time to have fun on a regular basis.  Most of us don’t even realize how essential this is!

I have noticed, from conversations with friends and clients, that the first thing most of us do when we feel any restriction on our time or our finances, is let go of the very things that are recharging our batteries so we have enough energy to get through the “must-do’s” that fill our days.  We stop meditating or going to yoga class, or drop our gym membership.  

But if we stop doing the things that lift our spirit, we become diminished. 

We need connection to our Inner Being.  It is essential, like water and oxygen.  A solid connection to core energy fosters a clear, satisfying understanding of my own abilities and my place in the world.  At our core, each and every one of us is Divine Source Energy.  The Soul at the core of our being is God’s Love & Light.  Remembering this and connecting to it regularly is the basis of faith.

I am not talking about religious faith.  Personally I have no use for religion, though I know for some people it is a successful bridge to spiritual connection and unconditional love.  I am talking about faith that comes from aligning yourself with God’s point of view which is always unconditional love.  I said I have no use for religion, I did not say I don’t believe in God.  Or Goddess, or Source Energy, or Spirit, or Inner Being, or Higher Power or whatever name you choose to call the one and only Source of all things.

When I speak of “faith” I mean that innate KNOWING that the best possible outcome is always on it’s way.  I am talking about the freedom that comes from living without worry and fear.  

Most days of my life I am AWESOME!  Most days I am able to lean in the direction of finding joy and laughter along my way.

But practicing happiness is a choice we make each day.  I’ve been actively practicing happiness nearly every day for over a decade and it STILL takes practice!  Occasionally I still allow people or circumstances in my environment to knock me out of my high vibes into self-doubt.

The difference for me now is this: 

When I get knocked in the dirt, I remember how to get back up.

I have tools that help me shift my perspective.  I have practiced often enough that I actually REMEMBER to use them when I need them.  When I am in crisis, I call my spiritual psychotherapist and mentor, Jill Lebeau.  I listen to Abraham-Hicks recordings.  I practice reading empowerment reminders, and create my own that you can enjoy here: Cyndi’s Pics.  I go for a run on my elliptical.  I find some way to shift my focus, realign my energy, and regroup on a positive vibe.

Shifting perspective, or shifting focus, or realigning energy with Source is something I practice every single day.  The more I practice, the easier and more fun life gets, and when I forget to practice for a while life seems to get a little harder.

Shifting perspective has allowed me to:

  • recover from decades-long depression
  • build self esteem
  • speak my truth with courage 
  • live more authentically
  • discover my life’s purpose 
  • find joy in daily living
  • get excited about nourishing choices
  • transform doubt into confidence

As a self-empowerment coach and wellness motivator, I help my clients practice the shift that shifts everything.  I help them remember to practice happiness daily.  I help them remember who they are at the core of their being.  And every time I help someone else remember, I am remembering, and healing myself.  

I will use this blog as a place to remind myself and my readers of wonderful ways to stay connected to the high vibes that are so much fun to live in!

Together we can raise the vibration of the planet one person at a time!