I am the Light.

I have been feeling a little stressed lately. Thinking about family worries, financial setbacks, and fading friendships has left me feeling a bit depleted. Unexpected and unwelcome changes to holiday plans left me feeling picked on because my expectations weren’t met. Why is it always ME that has to compromise?

Honestly I was feeling disappointed, and slightly victimized.

My friend and mentor, encouraged me to think about how I want to FEEL on a daily basis throughout the holidays, and suggested I choose a word or phrase to use as a guiding light through the coming weeks.

Thinking about that, I decided that I want to feel my power. I want to feel the way I feel when I am connected to Source energy, and letting the Light of undiluted Love flow through me! And I want that for everyone else, too. I want to see pure positive energy – the Light of unconditional Love – spread like wildfire across the globe. 

I am the Light.

THAT is how I wish to feel throughout the holidays and into the New Years, and decades ahead! I am the Light.

When I am the Light, I cannot feel disappointment or fear. I simply shine from within. I shine with infinite Source energy. I am not bound by limiting expectations, because all I expect is illumination – no matter my direction of travel.

Jesus talks about not putting one’s light under a bushel but making it visible for all to see. Christianity says Christ is the light in all beings. Science talks of photons or light waves being present in every atom in the universe. Buddhism says Buddha is always shining, always emitting light. Buddha said, “Be you lamps unto yourselves.”  
Daily Meditations

I am the Light.

This is my mantra for the holiday season, and coming year.

I am the Light.

When I feel powerless,
I choose to step into my power – the Truth of Who I am. I am Goddess, Source Energy, the energy that creates worlds, and I am neither powerless, nor victim.
Not fucking EVER.

I am the Light.

I CHOOSE to be the Light.
I choose to SHINE.
I choose to love – unconditionally.
I choose Faith.
I choose to TRUST that the Universe has my back.
I choose to BELIEVE that everything turns out for the highest good, even when my human mind cannot see HOW it is good.
I choose to believe that I am worthy, and so is everyone else, even when I feel crappy.
I choose to spend time in nature because it feeds my soul.
I follow the Light within.
I am the Light I see in reflected in my world.
I am the Light, and I choose to fucking SHINE!

I am the Light.

Please remember that YOU, too, are the Light. 

Winter Solstice is the darkest time of year. Let’s give ourselves, and each other the gift of being the Light. I wish you a new year full of health, abundance, opportunities, and blessings.

Let there be Light.

Give Thanks for Miracles!

Life is a series of millions of tiny miracles.

Don’t just notice them. Appreciate the fuck out of them!

Appreciation is the HIGHEST vibe available to humans. Love and appreciation are the same. We are here on this planet to allow love to flow through us and into our world!

I know that life on earth is a mixed bag. It’s super easy to focus on challenges and obstacles – they arise to shift our focus. But often we become SO focussed on the challenge, that we don’t even notice miracles, let alone appreciate them. 

I invite you to let the love flow, for no other reason than it feels fucking amazing! When you feel yourself contract in fear (worry, guilt, regret, resentment, etc…), take a deep grounding breath and allow yourself to expand into love.

How? 

Infuse appreciation into every miracle around.

Now, if we have been focused on fear for awhile, we may not even recognize the miracles. If this is where you find yourself, don’t panic. You are not alone in this by any score, and nothing has gone wrong! We are culturally conditioned to look for what is going wrong or might go wrong, threats to our lives, finances, and health, and circumstances outside of our control.

It is my honor, and great pleasure, to help people refocus on ALL we have to appreciate in our lives! Recognizing everyday miracles, and flowing love & appreciation to them serves our health, uplifts our mood, and connects us to infinite wisdom.

I present an incomplete list of miracles to which we can flow love and appreciation.

  • sunshine
  • rain
  • clouds
  • oxygen
  • flowers
  • gardens
  • trees
  • birds
  • butterflies
  • rainbows
  • food (other stuff exists that provides nutrients we require to survive!)
  • dogs
  • cats
  • babies
  • running hot water
  • internet and the level of connectivity it provides
  • grocery delivery! (Imagine what pioneers on the prairie would MAKE of that!)
  • true friends
  • imagination!
  • challenges & obstacles – It is common to curse obstacles, and cast the self as victim when challenges arise. If we shift our point of view and ask what Love is teaching with this challenge, the way through becomes clear. The challenge is ALWAYS a gift, even when we cannot see the value.
  • legs that carry us through life
  • eyes to see the beauty in the world
  • arms to hold the ones we love
  • intestines that digest everything, even when we eat unconsciously.
  • an immune system that protects our lives from unseeable organisms
  • tastebuds!
  • lungs that inhale and exhale
  • blood that delivers oxygen and nutrients
  • organs that serve our survival without us even understanding what they do!
  • a heart that beats without us having to think about it, 24 hours a day, seven days a week, every week of every year of our life!
  • eardrums!
  • our ability to smell pine, and cloves, and roses, and puppy breath
  • Self! – the sum total of billions of living cells that compose the flesh, and life that are you, is nothing short of a miracle!

There is NOTHING more important to which we flow our love and appreciation than self.  Self-love is the key to transforming anything we wish to change. And if there is nothing we wish to change, flowing love and appreciation to self will enhance the perfection we are enjoying!

If we see nothing to appreciate, it is only because we have not cultivated an appreciation of the miracles that surround us. We have been conditioned to take miracles for granted. 

We can absolutely condition ourselves to see them everywhere.
We invite MORE miracles by focusing on miracles!

Grow on!

I invite us to bask in the sunlight of our own miraculous being.
I invite us to look for miracles, NAME them, and infuse them with appreciation and love. Start with the ones I list above. More and more miracles will become obvious.
Practice looking at challenges as a miracle designed by our soul to provide an amazing gift, and deeper understanding of love.


Enjoy previous blog posts on appreciation and gratitude:
Count Your Fucking Blessings
Gratitude Infusion
Deep Gratitude for 2021

The Mean Voice is ALWAYS Wrong

The mean voice is always wrong. I don’t care what’s being said. If it is said with mean intent, or in a way meant to diminish us or hold us back, it is inaccurate. 

When others speak to me with a mean voice, it doesn’t matter what they are saying. It’s inaccurate because whatever they’re saying at me, is truly intended for them to hear. It has nothing to do with me and has only to do with how in alignment, or out of alignment, they are in that moment.

More importantly, when I speak to myself in a mean way, the message is always wrong. The mean girl voice in my head (aka gremlin voice, monster voice) is wrong every time she speaks.

How do I know she’s wrong?

That nasty feeling churning in my gut tells me she’s wrong. The crappy way it makes me feel every time she says something mean to me is a clear indication that she’s wrong. It’s a clear indication that I am thinking in a way that is as vibrationally far from my true vibration (Source) as I can get. That’s why it feels crappy.

When we hear something and it resonates within us, we feel the truth of that vibration and know it’s true by the way it feels in us – resonant.

When we hear something and it feels discordant within us, we feel the wrongness in that vibration and know it is wrong by the way it feels in us – harsh and jarring because it lacks harmony with our Source vibration.

Now, if you – like so many people – have a critical voice in your head constantly scolding that you are too this, then not enough that, and certainly should always be this way, and absolutely never ever be THAT way, or telling you that everything you do is wrong, and will never be enough, then PLEASE take a deep breath!

Not one of those messages is true, no matter how convinced you may be in the moment that the statement is valid or accurate. The message is coming from a mindset that is out of alignment with our Source energy, our True vibration. So take another deep breath and remind yourself of that Truth.

The mean girl voice is trying to protect us from something. At some point in our past something happened that we did not enjoy, and do NOT wish to repeat. Mean girl (or the Gremlin) arose to protect us from that happening again. The mean voice is a part of ourselves trying to protect us from reliving some past hurt.

Unfortunately the way that she often tries to protect us is by having us play small. If we stop living life and stop taking chances, or reaching for something we really want, there will be FAR fewer opportunities for us to get hurt. And while that may have been an excellent strategy for a seven-year-old avoiding parental disappointment or wrath, it is energy-draining and self-defeating as a strategy in the adult world.

So we can love that scared part of ourselves, and give her a big ole hug for everything she’s been doing to try to help us. Then in my mind, I like to lead her to a lounge chair at the beach, hand her a margarita, and tell her to relax and take some time off!

Every time she gets off her beach chair and slings criticism at me, I recognize it by the discordant feeling within. That’s my cue to take a deep cleansing breath, and remind her (and me) that’s old, outdated thinking, and we’re not thinking that way anymore!

Then I go one step further to help heal this negative messaging that has been programmed into me.

Whatever the criticism was, whatever the mean comment, I KNOW that it’s wrong, so I turn it around.

If she tells me I did something wrong, I look for what I did well.

If she says I am ugly or unworthy, I write myself a love letter and tell me all the ways I am beautiful and worthy.

If she tells me I’m fat, I remind her that body shaming is unacceptable. 

Fabulous, amazing, beautiful women come in every size and shape of body, and every one of those bodies is beautiful and worthy. Our culture has a broken vision of what beauty is, and critical views of what we “should” look like in order to be considered beautiful. Well fuck that. I will not allow the opinions of others to heap shame, or heavy negative judgement on myself or anyone else!

We have become so indoctrinated to this weight hate that women sometimes put off living our lives. We’re finally going to have it all figured out and live our dreams when we reach that magic number on a scale. (Scales are treacherous, lying machines that will give you completely different numbers at different times of day, or in different rooms of the house. If you have a scale lurking somewhere in your home, I highly recommend destroying it at once.)

As long as we are focused on what we weigh, we will never be focused on what is truly important. (Hint: NOT a number on a lying scale.) Maybe that’s the reason the patriarchy decided to brainwash us into focusing on what we weigh in the first place?  

Please remember when you hear the mean voice that she is wrong.

You can choose to start reprogramming your thoughts to ones that make you feel amazing, beautiful, happy, and fulfilled every day of your life!

Grow on!

What message is the critic in your head repeating?
How true is that?
What would you rather believe?
If you heard someone give that same criticism to a young person you love, what would you tell the young person? What would you say to the mean girl voice?

Stairway to Heaven on Earth

A shift in mindset can literally be the difference between experiencing a living hell, or living heaven on earth. 

Mindset is EVERYTHING. Mindset is the vibrational set point of our thinking. It is the accumulation of established thoughts and beliefs we hold to be true. 

Energy attracts like energy, so what we vibrate, we attract.

We can think of our vibrational set point (mindset) as our radio station. Our current mindset is the station to which we’re tuned. Therefore the ONLY thing we can currently experience is what’s being broadcast on our station. If we do not like our experience, we must change the station to get something different.

We cannot change the experience being broadcast. In order to experience a different broadcast, we must change our station, by changing how we perceive.

What we perceive is what we receive.

If we believe that we live in a godless universe, where others cannot be trusted, where we must do it all on our own, and struggle for what we have; we are having a very different experience broadcast to us than someone who believes that the Universe has her back, sends frequent angels to support her, and flows resources to her effortlessly. 

Changing our radio station (mindset) allows us to attract something different than we have been experiencing. If we are not currently enjoying our experience, it is vital to shift our mindset.  In order to shift our mindset to attract something different than we have been attracting, we must begin to shift the thoughts we are thinking, and be willing to let go of beliefs that do not serve us.

The question then is, how do we change what we believe?

Awareness is always the first step! We can only change something if we are AWARE that we want to change it. Once we have recognized that something we think or believe no longer serves us, we need a process to help us overwrite those beliefs with new ones that support and inspire us!

We need a process because if we truly believe something, we cannot simply stop believing that, and start believing something contrary. The human brain won’t leap like that. 

For example, we cannot go from thinking, “I hate my body because it’s fat,” to thinking, “I love my body unconditionally,” in the same breath. Our vibration will physically reject the opposing thought because it does not resonate with our current mindset/vibration.

Wheels & Ladders

Here are four processes wonderful for shifting mindset, or point of attraction.

Focus Wheel Process

Esther Hicks and Abraham offered us the Focus Wheel Process in the book Ask and it is Given

We place the thought we wish to believe in the center, then write thoughts around the outside which we already believe, thoughts that resonate with our current mindset, meaning – we already believe them. Practicing these believable thoughts moves us closer to the center thought we wish to believe.

Esther says to use the focus wheel process:

  • When you realize that your current Vibrational Point of Attraction is not where you want it to be.
  • When you are aware that you are feeling negative emotion about something that is important, and you want to find a way of feeling positive emotion instead.
  • When something has just happened that is not to your liking, and you want to think about it while it is on your mind and change your point of attraction so that it does not happen again.
  • When you are reaching for a feeling of relief.

For me, the key bit here is reaching for a feeling of relief. When we are thinking thoughts that make us feel icky, anxious, or worried, finding thoughts that RELIEVE the anxiety, worry, and shame is solid GOLD.

Abraham’s Focus Wheel Process is highly effective for many people.

Training Wheels

Another process we can use to shift our thoughts, our mindset, our vibrational point of attraction is Training Wheels. Training wheels help us soften the thought we desire to believe, and bring it closer to our current vibrational range. Training wheels are sentence fragments tacked onto the thought we wish to believe.

Examples of Training Wheels:
Why is it so easy to…
I am learning to…
I am ready to…
I feel empowered when…
Today I begin to…
I choose to…

Training wheels on our example: I love my body unconditionally.
Why is it so easy to love my body unconditionally?
I am learning to love my body unconditionally.
I am ready to love my body unconditionally.
I feel empowered when I love my body unconditionally.
Today I begin to love my body unconditionally.
I choose to love my body unconditionally.

If the training wheel thought is one we BELIEVE, we are on our way!  Shifting from a limiting belief to an inspiring belief takes PRACTICE, so we want to practice the training wheel thought frequently until we feel ready to take the training wheels off.

Training Wheels Process is a super effective way to begin shifting our beliefs!

Laddering Thoughts

I love Laddering Thoughts Process! Imagine the limiting belief on the bottom rung of the ladder. Now place the thought we WANT to think at the top of the ladder.

Now we climb the ladder one better-feeling thought at a time! Each thought is a rung on the ladder taking us closer to the empowering thought at the top. You can absolutely use Training Wheels to help you up the ladder if you find some that raise your vibration. 

You can also use neutral thoughts since neutral is always a higher vibe than negative. For example, instead of the negatively charged, “I hate my body” we can use the neutral statement, “I have a body” to climb one rung up on the ladder. That’s a true statement, so it can resonate with anyone. “My body has physically supported me since birth,” is also true. If it resonates, we can use it to climb one rung closer to the higher vibration we desire!

Try these thoughts, and if they resonate, we can climb the next rung:

Some people love their bodies unconditionally.
I would like to love my body unconditionally.
The more I love my body, the more it loves me back.
Occasionally, I love my body unconditionally.
It is possible to love my body unconditionally.

Remember: you need to practice the Laddering Thoughts that resonate for you every day, throughout the day. Once a thought feels more believable, move up the ladder! 

Stairway to Heaven

I adore the Laddering Thoughts Process, and I love to shift thoughts from bad feeling to good feeling, and from good feeling to better feeling.

So I shifted the idea of the thought ladder into the image of a fully supported staircase with double handrails. Now instead of my steps being shaky, or unstable, I feel steady and supported as I climb my Thought Stairway!

The handrail I offer is a choice of uplifting thoughts galore. Many years ago I began creating positive affirmation cards (daily mantra or empowerment cards) for a friend who was going through challenging times.

I take positive statements that feel good when I say them, and print them on my inspiring landscape photography. Currently I have created more than 500, and I invite you to freely download any that resonate for you, and use them to support you on your Stairway to Heaven on Earth!

My fabulous fucking Toy Box contains a treasure trove of guiding support from many wise hearts who are consistently lighting the way toward Heaven on Earth. I invite you to explore and play with these amazing resources, and incorporate whatever resonates for you. This is how we feel supported and guided as we shift our thoughts up the stairs.

We can use our Thought Stairway to climb from wherever we are on the vibrational scale to wherever we wish to be on the vibrational scale. Thought Stairway can lift us from the deepest depths of despair, unworthiness, and shame, right up to heaven on earth!

With PRACTICE.

These wonderful processes help us retrain our neural pathways, and that takes time and practice.

I encourage you not to give up! We reach a tipping point when we finally feel closer to the top of the staircase than the bottom, and that is when we keep practicing!

We play with shifting our thoughts upward. We keep joyfully rising toward that higher vibration, toward renewed mindset, and fresh perspectives.

This is our spiritual practice, to move ourselves closer and closer to the perspective/vibration of that which we call God, Source Energy, Infinite Wisdom. Because living fully in that energy here and now is what it means to live in Heaven on Earth.

Grow on!

What thoughts are you thinking that are limiting your growth?
How does that thought feel when you think it?
What emotion would you rather feel?
What thought can you think that creates that desired emotion within you?
Play with the above processes to climb from the limiting thought to the freeing one!

Gratitude Infusion!

The Role of Spirit in Creating Perfect Health and Wellness is a recent episode of my favorite podcast, The Spiritual Sandbox with Jill Lebeau and Amit West, where they welcomed special guest Michelle Dwyer.

The topic was one of my favorites – alignment with Spirit, or Source Energy. The laughter alone, from this high vibe trio of brilliant women, would be enough for me to recommend the episode to lift your soul. Their joy is palpable through the entire episode! The episode also overflows with gems of wisdom, many of which felt like I was hearing them for the first time, despite my own familiarity with some.

The idea of gratitude infusion deeply resonated for me, and I jumped in with both feet! 

I also want to share that – even though I recently completed leading a group of clients in releasing negative self talk – some of my first thoughts were, “I should have already been doing this. How did I miss something so obvious? Why am I always doing something wrong?” And then I took a deep breath and infused the moment with gratitude!
I flowed appreciation to Jill and Amit for their wonderful, and much needed podcast. I flowed appreciation to Michelle for the reminder to flow gratitude into each and every moment, and for her beautiful description of cultivating a garden of self love! I flowed appreciation to myself for being open to receiving the reminder, and the willingness to put it into action.

Now each time I feel frustrated or irritated with something, I infuse it with gratitude, and it instantly feels better. I am trying to make a practice to infuse my actions, and my meals with love and appreciation, and when I forget, I infuse myself with gratitude for trying!

And gratitude infusion was just the tip of the topic! The podcast continued it’s perfection with exquisitely timed feedback that echoed the idea that “in every moment, in every breath, in every heartbeat, we are given the choice to begin again!” Fabulous!

In one short hour, they talked about scarcity and abundance, the healing magic of self-love, the importance of mindset, the power of self-expression, energetic root causes, elevating the ordinary to sacred, and so much more! They reminded us wholly how to reclaim our power, and concisely answered the question, “Why are we here?”

This incredible episode of the Magical Spiritual Sandbox podcast manifests instant alignment with the Universe, and also gives listeners the secret to constant alignment with the Universe, should they choose to wield it.

I simply can’t recommend this podcast, and specifically this episode enough. It lifts, enlightens, and transforms. I won’t guarantee a spiritual transformation, but it certainly is within the realm of possibilities. 

Grow on!

Listen to this episode at THIS LINK.

The subtle art of not giving a FUCK what other people think

First and foremost, you are God. The energy animating our flesh is Divine Source energy, or what people like to call God.

Your core energy is Divine.
My core energy is Divine.
Their core energy is Divine.

Every one of us is an expression of the Divine Source energy that created everything in the Universe. We are absolutely perfect despite whatever flaws or shortcomings we think we perceive. When we begin with this understanding, it’s easy to see that no one is better than anyone. We are all equal, all One energy.

How other people think, and speak about me is NONE of my business because it has NOTHING to do with me.

What other people think of me, and how they treat me has NOTHING to do with me.

How other people think about me, what they say about me, and how they treat me has to do with only ONE thing, and it’s NOT me!

How other people think about me, what they say about me, and how they treat me has to do with only one thing: How in alignment, or out of alignment they are with their own core energy.

How in alignment, or out of alignment THEY are with THEIR own core energy. (Not my energy.) It has NOTHING to do with me.

Trying to figure out why they don’t like me, or why they treated me like that, or what I did “wrong” is a complete WASTE of energy! Trying to change their mind is also a huge waste of energy, and generally backfires because we feel defensive.

Does it feel good to be liked by others?

Absolutely!

Is it necessary for your wellbeing?

Not a chance.

If we live in such a way as to BE what someone else wants us to be, we are not our true authentic self. To BE the YOU that you came here to be, you must learn to listen to the guidance INSIDE of YOU. When we look outside for guidance, it’s complete chaos! 

Why?

Have you ever tried to get EVERYBODY, or even a large group of people to agree on ANYTHING? Everyone has their own idea about what’s right or wrong, or effective, based ONLY on their own experience and viewpoint. They do NOT have a guide book with hard and fast rules that work for every life.

Diet as an example.
How much do people agree on what the perfect weight loss plan is?
Do you see that working for EVERYONE?

WHY follow a path that someone ELSE is excited and passionate about when you can choose to follow a path that excites YOU, and that YOU are passionate about? If we follow a path made of other people’s opinions, the magnificent fullness of who you came here to BE cannot be realized, and you are cheating the world out of the unique perspective, the individual viewpoint that is YOU.

This is the definition of giving away your power.

This does not mean we can’t live a life that serves others, or in service to others – as long as we CHOOSE it for ourselves. If you are living a life of service because someone else wants you to, FUCK that!

And we don’t want to choose service to others ABOVE serving our own needs! You are not an afterthought! You are the central character in your own story.

I worry that others are judging me!

This thought is a mirror in two ways.

1- You judge yourself harshly, so you see them judging you.
2- You are judging them to be judgers in the process.

No one is ever judging you as harshly as you judge yourself. If they do, cut them out of your life, or minimize time spent with them, or set healthy boundaries by telling them to stop it.

The more you love yourself, the less harshly you criticize yourself, the easier it will be to see them as less critical, and less judgemental.

While you are not giving a fuck about what people think, I would also LOVE for you to not give a fuck what people do!

Other people are not the boss of you.
You are also not the boss of them!

They get to choose what they think is right and best for them. When we try to choose for them, our energy becomes entangled.

Energy entanglements DRAIN us!

Think how much energy it takes to make decisions for yourself and run your own life. Do you REALLY have the energy to also do that for everyone you love, and strangers too?

If so, WHERE on earth did you find that rule book titled This is the ONE right way for everyone! by R.O. Gant?

HUGE energy drain, and…

This is the definition of taking away their power, and we drain our own power when we try.

Short of situations where someone is harming you or others, take a deep breath and let that shit go!

Just a magical fucking reminder…

I am magic. I know I am magic, and no one can stop my magical ass!

I have a T-shirt that announces this truth to the world, and yet sometimes I still forget. Why? Because I’m human. When humans come here from nonphysical, we agree to forget our magic so that we can have the expansive experience of finding our way back to our magic, back to our power – the power of All that Is.

We come here intending to find our way back to magic, and to remind our fellow travelers of the Truth that we are all made of magic, and that we are surrounded by miracles everywhere.

At our core – each of us is magic with the power that creates worlds at our disposal. And we are also magically human.

Being human comes with challenges. We can experience confusion and doubt about our own magic. Some of us have been taught by other humans that magic is not real, yet we may sense it’s presence occasionally and feel drawn toward it. Even those of us who strongly believe in magic are human with human challenges.

When those who are asleep to their own magic lash out in fear at the magic-believing human, it can feel like a punch in the gut. It can feel like being plunged into darkness where the light of our own magic does not shine.

This does not mean that anything has gone wrong!

If we do not experience darkness, how can we know that we prefer the light? The darkness is simply one experience. It is not permanent. Whatever emotion we experience – positive or negative – is temporary and will pass.  

Acceptance of the unwanted emotion is key. 

We can face it head on and say something like, “I would prefer to not feel this emotion, but it is the emotion I am feeling, so I will choose it. I will allow myself to feel it, and be with it until it begins to transform.” 

We can dance with unwanted emotions, or hike with them to help move them more quickly through our experience. Any enjoyable physical activity helps move emotions. We can sit calmly with the unwanted emotion as if it were a visitor, and ask what message it has for us. Welcoming unwanted emotions and listening to them diminishes them, and empowers us.

Emotions are energy in motion. If we resist them, they stay with us longer, and can sometimes get stuck. If we choose to accept the experience of the unwanted emotion, the energy will stay in motion and transform more quickly.

Remembering our magic is key.

There is magic in reminding our fellow travelers of our magic. And while it is purpose-filled, and fulfilling to call others back to the light, we bear no responsibility for the ability of others to see their own light, or to connect with their magic.

Let go of people who tear you down and diminish your light, or make you doubt your own magic. Follow your inner light. Ascend into your own magic without feeling responsible for bringing everyone else along with you.

Find people who remind you that you ARE the light! Read books by authors that remind you that Source energy flows through you and everyone around you. Subscribe to blogs, tune in to podcasts, and watch YouTube videos that remind you of your magic and help reconnect you to the magical flow of life.

Grow on!

When you discover that someone or something in your life diminishes you, or depletes your energy repeatedly, have the courage to let it go.

Make a list of all the people, places, books, or blogs that remind you of your magic. Enjoy everything on your list frequently! Share those uplifting sources with everyone to remind them of their light too! 

In my toy box, I keep a running list of resources that inspire the crap outta me and my clients. Share your favorites with us in the comments and I’ll add them to the list!

There is no death. We do not die.

Death is a paradox. For those who pass, death is freeing, expansive, exhilarating, and joyful. Those left grieving may feel sadder, and heavier than at any time in our lives. Grief is the place, perhaps, where we most keenly feel separation. We feel as though our loved one has gone, and we cannot reach them anymore. And as real as that thought feels, nothing could be farther from the truth.

There is no separation between us and them, between where we stand and where they have gone. Those who have made the transition from physical to nonphysical are right here with us. Always. They are interested now in all of the things they were always interested in. They are present with us and interested in our experience. They never leave us. They are here now. And now. And now. No matter how long ago they left their physical body, they love us eternally. They are with us continuously. If they were still physical we would trip over them, they are constantly THAT close.

This doesn’t mean we won’t feel grief, sadness, or loneliness after a loss. On the contrary. Experiencing separation, then finding our way back to love and oneness is our purpose in coming here! If we wanted an existence of pure joy and unconditional love, we need never leave nonphysical to come here and be human. 

But nothing beats the thrill of feeling all of the emotions that humans feel. Nothing feels more exhilarating than feeling separation, then remembering our Oneness, our connection, our inner Light. 

Everything is vibration, or frequency. On this physical plane, our vibration is slow and heavy. On the nonphysical plane, the vibration is fast and light. That is how those in nonphysical can exist alongside us without us perceiving them. It’s like we are tuned into one radio station called low and slow, and they are broadcasting on a different station called flying high. 

Consciously tuning ourselves more toward ‘flying high’ allows us to begin to receive our nonphysical friends more often, to feel our connection to them again, to perceive that they are still with us, and feel less alone.

I am not suggesting that we should not feel sadness or loss. Please do! Feel it as deeply as you dare. Experience the grief for as long as seems right for you. But then, when you begin to feel ready, remember that we are not separate from those we love. Remember that they are with us here and now, and allow the feeling of connection to resume.

Watch for messages from them, because they will find ways to tell you they love you. Look for them in rainbows, in the sunlit sparkles dancing across the water, in the quiet morning hours between awake and asleep, in the artistic splendor of a sunset. Look for them when you play their favorite game, at the card table or on the golf course. Feel their presence as you walk along the beach, or through the trees.

Whenever I get goose bumps I say hello to my aunt Verla. I also greet her when I see a cardinal, a turtle, or a duck. These symbols meant something to her in the flesh, and they mean something to her now. They are our sacred meeting places, and it is impossible to feel alone when I allow myself to connect to her presence.

Death is part of the illusion. We are One. All is well.

Grow on!

Every time you think of the one you lost, look around. They are with you! Where do you see/feel their presence?

Ask them questions you might ask them if they were still physical, then be open to receiving their answers. They can still guide us through intuition and inspiration. They can inspire others to tell us what they want us to know.

If you sit quietly and breathe deeply, what would they want you to know?

Consider these two famous poems about NOT dying.
Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep
Death is Nothing at All

I want to be a warrior.

My friend and mentor, Lisa Kaplin, posted this poem from Jeff Foster on her blog recently. It’s powerfully inspiring, and describes beautifully the consciousness to which I aspire, and that I wish for all living beings.

I wish to be this type of warrior.

How I Became A Warrior
by Jeff Foster

Once,
I ran from fear
so fear controlled me.
Until I learned to hold fear
like a newborn.
Listen to it,
but not give in.
Honour it,
but not worship it.
Fear could not stop me
anymore.
I walked with courage
into the storm.
I still have fear,
but it does not have me.
Once,
I was ashamed of who I was.
I invited shame into my heart.
I let it burn.
It told me, "I am only trying
to protect your vulnerability."
I thanked shame dearly,
and stepped into life anyway,
unashamed,
with shame as a lover.
Once,
I had great sadness
buried deep inside.
I invited it to come out and play.
I wept oceans.
My tear ducts ran dry.
And I found joy right there.
Right at the core of my sorrow.
It was heartbreak that taught
me how to love.
Once,
I had anxiety.
A mind that wouldn't stop.
Thoughts that wouldn't be silent.
So I stopped trying to
silence them.
And I dropped out of the mind,
and into the Earth.
Into the mud.
Where I was held strong
like a tree,
unshakeable,
safe.
Once,
anger burned in the depths.
I called anger into the light
of myself.
I felt its shocking power.
I let my heart pound
and my blood boil.
Listened to it,
finally.
And it screamed,
"Respect yourself fiercely now!"
"Speak your truth with passion!"
"Say no when you mean no!"
"Walk your path with courage!"
"Let no one speak for you!"
Anger became an honest friend.
A truthful guide.
A beautiful wild child.
Once,
loneliness cut deep.
I tried to distract
and numb myself.
Ran to people and places
and things.
Even pretended I was "happy."
But soon I could not run anymore.
And I tumbled into the heart
of loneliness.
And I died and was reborn
into an exquisite solitude
and stillness that connected me
to all things.
So I was not lonely,
but alone with All Life.
My heart One with all other hearts.
Once,
I ran from difficult feelings.
Now, they are my advisors,
confidants, friends,
and they all have a home in me,
and they all belong
and have dignity.
I am sensitive, soft, fragile,
my arms wrapped around
all my inner children.
And in my sensitivity, power.
In my fragility,
an unshakeable presence.
In the depths of my wounds,
in what I had named “darkness,”
I found a blazing Light
that guides me now in battle.
I became a warrior
when I turned towards myself.
And started listening.

Feel good NOW!

Most of us know that when we look good, we tend to feel good.
But are you aware that the opposite is also true?

When we feel good, we look good.

Think about a time when you felt really great about yourself.  How much more comfortable were you in your own skin?  How powerful and confident did you feel?  When we feel accomplished, triumphant, successful, truly loved, filled with purpose – of course we look better.  Our body chemistry is completely different than when we feel confused, failed, unloved, directionless, or under attack.

It is common in this world, I have noticed, for people who are reaching for a weight-loss goal to try to reach that goal by forcing, harassing, restricting, stressing, pushing, and hating themselves.  

It is also common to decide that the body is not right by societal standards, so it must not be liked, in fact it must be hated.  We feel we must hate the body into submission, hate our eating issues for making us fat, hate food for being so fattening and delicious at the same time, hate our appetite, flog ourselves at the gym until we finally reach a weight where we will feel better about ourselves, or just give up entirely and eat for solace because we are so damned imperfect.

If any of this resonates for you, you’re not alone! 

Somehow this crazy world has conditioned us (brainwashed us through media propaganda, and advertising campaigns designed to sell a magic fix for bodies that are not right by societal standards) to believe that we must hate ourselves until we reach their standards.  To which I feel compelled to reply:

Fuck. Their. Fucking. Standards.

I invite you to join me in saying, “Fuck their standards.” 

If they don’t like my body, FUCK them.  Because you know what I decided to do?  I decided to approve of my body right now.  I decided that their standards are fucking stupid, and they do not appeal to me, so they do not apply to me because I am the authority on what is fucking beautiful in my life.  

Why?  Cause it’s my life. 

Their judgements only count if I give them validity and I just revoked their right to decide anything for me.  I choose to decide for myself.  I invite each of you to step into your own power and decide for your self what is beautiful in your life, because who the fuck are THEY anyway?  Who are they to judge ME unworthy? 

I am a child of God, a conduit of Divine love and light, and I will not dim my light to allow them to feel comfortable in my presence!

They want me to feel diminished, unworthy, and powerless so that they can grow rich and feel better about themselves. Fuck that! And while we’re at it, fuck the collective ‘them’ who believes they are anyone’s authority on what is good and right and beautiful.

If we feel more beautiful when we are feeling truly loved, then what POWER we wield when we choose to truly love ourselves as we are, without waiting for the approval of others.

I choose to feel my true divinity flowing through me.  I choose to feel confident and powerful.  And every time I feel the Divine Truth of Who I am, I look fucking amazing.

photo by donnio, on a day when i felt GREAT and it shows.

Grow on!

  • What is stopping you from feeling good about you NOW? 
  • What baby steps can you take toward loving yourself more now?
  • What kind of example do you want to set for your children and grandchildren?
  • Each time you become aware that negative self-talk arises,
    what can you say to remind yourself to move gently back in the direction of self-love?