{"id":2097,"date":"2019-09-18T05:55:53","date_gmt":"2019-09-18T12:55:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/?p=2097"},"modified":"2024-05-15T10:35:12","modified_gmt":"2024-05-15T17:35:12","slug":"suffering-is-optional","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/2019\/09\/18\/suffering-is-optional\/","title":{"rendered":"Suffering is Optional"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Suffering happens when we wish things were different than they are.&nbsp; Period.<\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>Pain happens in life.&nbsp; Every person in the Universe faces challenges and difficult situations.&nbsp; Every one of us.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>We&nbsp;<em>think<\/em> we are suffering because the other person did something that hurt us, or because we don\u2019t earn enough money to take the vacation we want, or we lost our job, or we weigh more than we want to weigh, or we\u2019ve suffered an injury or accident, or because someone we love passed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>But the&nbsp;<em>suffering<\/em>&nbsp;&#8211; the&nbsp;<em>continued<\/em> worsening of the pain &#8211; is something we create by wishing things were different than they are.  I&#8217;m not saying those things aren\u2019t hard or painful. They are difficult and challenging and they will absolutely slow us down some. &nbsp;   However suffering is not caused by \u2018what is.\u2019&nbsp; We cause suffering by RESISTING \u2018what is.\u2019  We\u2019re human.&nbsp; Pain is a normal part of existence.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"aligncenter\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1024\" height=\"614\" src=\"http:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/optional-copy-1024x614.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-2100\" srcset=\"https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/optional-copy-1024x614.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/optional-copy-300x180.jpg 300w, https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/optional-copy-768x461.jpg 768w, https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/optional-copy.jpg 1500w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p>But when we spend hours, days or weeks puzzling over&nbsp;<em>why<\/em> this has happened to us, or how we might have prevented it, or how we can still make things turn out \u2018right\u2019 or how we just wish so MUCH that things turned out differently &#8211; that is RESISTING what is.  Resisting what is causes suffering. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Suffering is optional because we&#8217;re creating it ourselves!<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>What is it you\u2019re resisting?&nbsp; <br>What would happen if you simply allow it to be what it is?&nbsp; <br>What would it mean to accept the situation as it is?&nbsp; <br>What would change for you?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Personal Story<\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>Once upon a time, I lived on a diet composed mostly of wheat and dairy.&nbsp; I LOVE the stuff!&nbsp; Give me a bagel with cream cheese for breakfast, a quesadilla for lunch, and pizza for dinner and I am delighted!&nbsp; Then I found out that I am allergic to wheat and dairy after becoming extremely ill from eating too much of the stuff.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I was miserable thinking of all the cheese I would never eat again!&nbsp; <br>I was mad at the world for the unfairness of my challenge, and disappointed in my body for not being able to handle my fave foods like a &#8220;normal&#8221; person.&nbsp; I couldn\u2019t picture a world where I could possibly ever hike again, because everyone knows the perfect fuel for hiking is bread and cheese!&nbsp; Right?&nbsp; Luckily for me, I couldn\u2019t resist the changes because I was too sick, but I SUFFERED.  Believe me, I made sure of that.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Now, it\u2019s completely normal to feel disappointed in a situation like that.&nbsp; But it\u2019s not normal (or healthy) to resist what is.&nbsp; My body cannot handle something I want it to do.&nbsp; That\u2019s the fact.&nbsp; I can choose to resist it and resent it and be miserable about it, and no one would blame me!&nbsp; <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>But what happens if I simply accept the fact?  EVERYTHING shifts.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"aligncenter\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1024\" height=\"614\" src=\"http:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/look-1024x614.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-2119\" srcset=\"https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/look-1024x614.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/look-300x180.jpg 300w, https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/look-768x461.jpg 768w, https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/look.jpg 1500w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p>I\u2019m no longer draining my energy.&nbsp; I\u2019m not feeling victimized.&nbsp; Shifting my perspective is the key.&nbsp; I accept the situation <em>as it is,<\/em> and then I am free to play with new options that make me feel powerful instead of deprived!  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/2019\/04\/02\/the-cream-in-my-coffee\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" aria-label=\"Click this link for my EASY and delicious replacement for dairy cream! (opens in a new tab)\">Click this link for my EASY and delicious replacement for dairy cream!<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>YES, I love cheese, but what I truly, deeply want is vibrant good health which is vitally more important than the temporary and fleeting pleasure of a bowl of ice cream!  ESPECIALLY when it\u2019s so much fun <br>to discover fuels my body LOVES like mangoes and blueberries!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1024\" height=\"449\" src=\"http:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/2Mangoes-1024x449.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-2115\" srcset=\"https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/2Mangoes-1024x449.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/2Mangoes-300x132.jpg 300w, https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/2Mangoes-768x337.jpg 768w, https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/2Mangoes.jpg 1500w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><figcaption>Google image<br><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>As soon as we accept what is, we begin growing again.&nbsp; Resistance stunts our growth and keeps us stuck in pain, inaction, or both.  Before I accepted the situation, I kept coming up against the food allergies like an adversary that would pop up out of nowhere and knock me in the dirt.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Once I accepted the situation, I was able to build it into my life map.&nbsp; <\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>Then I was able to find fun creative ways to go with the flow.&nbsp; Seeing the obstacle for what it is, allows me to move around it with ease.&nbsp; I could then continue moving toward my dreams with a clearer picture of where I was standing and how to get where I want to be!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I am not \u201csettling\u201d for a life without wheat and dairy, I am THRIVING on a life path that has given me the blessings and challenges that have sculpted me into the awesome self I am today!  <br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The biggest gift of this journey is the radical self-acceptance I now offer myself daily.  I finally accept myself, just as I am, in all my <br>flaw-someness.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Suffering is optional.<\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>What are you currently suffering?  <br>How willing are you to accept it for what it is?<br>How much energy will that free up in your soul?<br>How will it change how you see yourself?<br>If you see it clearly in your life map, what fun, creative options does this open up for you?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"aligncenter\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"800\" height=\"533\" src=\"http:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/DSC01890_tonemapped-1.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-2121\" srcset=\"https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/DSC01890_tonemapped-1.jpg 800w, https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/DSC01890_tonemapped-1-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/DSC01890_tonemapped-1-768x512.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/figure><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Suffering happens when we wish things were different than they are.&nbsp; Period. Pain happens in life.&nbsp; Every person in the Universe faces challenges and difficult situations.&nbsp; Every one of us. We&nbsp;think we are suffering because the other person did something that hurt us, or because we don\u2019t earn enough money [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2107,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[32,11],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2097","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-food-allergies","category-mindset"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.3 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Suffering is Optional - Cyndi Combs Home<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/2019\/09\/18\/suffering-is-optional\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Suffering is Optional - Cyndi Combs Home\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Suffering happens when we wish things were different than they are.&nbsp; Period. 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