{"id":5840,"date":"2021-08-06T01:11:09","date_gmt":"2021-08-06T08:11:09","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/?p=5840"},"modified":"2024-05-15T10:31:00","modified_gmt":"2024-05-15T17:31:00","slug":"worry-is-a-choice","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/2021\/08\/06\/worry-is-a-choice\/","title":{"rendered":"Worry is a Choice"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>Lisa Kaplin writes an amazing blog about leadership, happiness, parenting, relationships, and so much more.\u00a0 I always learn something new, or see a new perspective.\u00a0 If you haven\u2019t read her blog before, I highly encourage you to follow this link and give her post, <a rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" aria-label=\"Worry isn\u2019t Love (opens in a new tab)\" href=\"http:\/\/lisakaplin.com\/worry-isnt-love\/\" target=\"_blank\"><em>Worry isn\u2019t Love<\/em><\/a> a read.\u00a0 Lisa\u2019s posts are always brief &amp; uplifting. I thought this passage was particularly brilliant:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h5 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><em>\u201cLove, at least to me, is unconditional listening, being fully present, and holding space for the other person. It\u2019s focusing on them, not what I feel when I\u2019m around them. Love is both giving and receiving of unconditional caring and space. None of that sounds like worry to me.\u201d<\/em><\/h5>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>So if worry does not show love, what does worry do?\u00a0 What are we getting from worry? \u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The voice of worry often arises when something unwanted happens.&nbsp; We don\u2019t want it to happen again, so a \u201cwatcher\u201d arises inside us to watch for any evidence that danger may be approaching.&nbsp; With our \u201cwatcher\u201d on duty, we may feel more secure because we feel that we\u2019ll see the danger coming and be able to avoid it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Originally we were getting protection or security from the watcher, but now we\u2019re just getting anxiety from constant worry.\u00a0  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Our worry voice is not trying to make us crazy at 3am, it\u2019s just trying to do it\u2019s job of protecting us, albeit more aggressively than necessary.&nbsp; All of this can be exhausting!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\">But what if I told you that worry is a choice?<\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>I know.&nbsp; Some of you just shut your computer off convinced I am crazy.&nbsp; Some of you are laughing out loud.&nbsp; But some of you are going, \u201cWait. What? I can choose NOT to worry?!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>If our \u201cworry voice\u201d arose to protect us, and made us feel more secure, it makes complete sense that we would choose worry again and again.&nbsp; We found comfort there &#8211; a long time ago.&nbsp; Now we just choose worry because it\u2019s the familiar, well-worn path that our mind wanders without thinking about where we\u2019re going.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Constant worry is heavy, so if we\u2019d like to set it down in favor of lighter emotions, we need to catch ourselves in the act.&nbsp; We need to cultivate AWARENESS.&nbsp; We want to become aware of WHEN we have anxious thoughts, because that is the only moment we could choose something else.&nbsp; The best way to be aware when worry has arisen, is to first become aware of how YOU feel physically when you have worrisome thoughts.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>This can be different for each of us!&nbsp; Just because anxiety feels like a twist in my solar plexus, doesn\u2019t mean that you and your body experience it that way.&nbsp; For this reason, I encourage my clients to write down how THEIR BODY feels when they are worried.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Examples might include a twist in the solar plexus, hot cheeks, shaking limbs, sweaty palms, a combination of any of these and others.&nbsp; Whatever it is for you, catalog the physical vibrations when you \u201cfeel\u201d worried. &nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Once we define what \u2018worried\u2019 feels like to us as individuals, it becomes easy to recognize when those physical vibrations\/symptoms begin.&nbsp; That moment we recognize that physical symptoms of worry are present triggers our awareness that \u201cTHIS\u201d is our moment to choose.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Once we are aware, we can choose.<\/strong><br>We get to choose worry, or choose something new.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"aligncenter\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1024\" height=\"614\" src=\"https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/happy_tonemapped-1024x614.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-5849\" srcset=\"https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/happy_tonemapped-1024x614.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/happy_tonemapped-300x180.jpg 300w, https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/happy_tonemapped-768x461.jpg 768w, https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/happy_tonemapped.jpg 1500w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p>In next week\u2019s blog post, we\u2019ll talk about taking back our power to choose in that magical moment of awareness.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Grow on!<\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>Name the emotion you feel. (<em>Happy, sad, worried, anxious, excited, etc\u2026<\/em>)<br>Write down the vibrations you feel in your body when you experience the emotion.<br>If you can, write down the thought(s) you were thinking directly before you became aware of the vibrations of that emotion.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>It&#8217;s totally fine to write down the physical vibrations you feel first, and then name the emotion.  It&#8217;s easier that way for some people.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Lisa Kaplin writes an amazing blog about leadership, happiness, parenting, relationships, and so much more.\u00a0 I always learn something new, or see a new perspective.\u00a0 If you haven\u2019t read her blog before, I highly encourage you to follow this link and give her post, Worry isn\u2019t Love a read.\u00a0 Lisa\u2019s [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":4664,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[13,11],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5840","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-empowerment","category-mindset"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.3 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Worry is a Choice - Cyndi Combs Home<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/2021\/08\/06\/worry-is-a-choice\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Worry is a Choice - Cyndi Combs Home\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Lisa Kaplin writes an amazing blog about leadership, happiness, parenting, relationships, and so much more.\u00a0 I always learn something new, or see a new perspective.\u00a0 If you haven\u2019t read her blog before, I highly encourage you to follow this link and give her post, Worry isn\u2019t Love a read.\u00a0 Lisa\u2019s [&hellip;]\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/2021\/08\/06\/worry-is-a-choice\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Cyndi Combs Home\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2021-08-06T08:11:09+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2024-05-15T17:31:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/07\/architect.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1500\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"900\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"cyndi\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"cyndi\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/2021\/08\/06\/worry-is-a-choice\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/2021\/08\/06\/worry-is-a-choice\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"cyndi\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/#\/schema\/person\/bef07b1a5005ea91c7817377119ee0b9\"},\"headline\":\"Worry is a Choice\",\"datePublished\":\"2021-08-06T08:11:09+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2024-05-15T17:31:00+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/2021\/08\/06\/worry-is-a-choice\/\"},\"wordCount\":692,\"commentCount\":0,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/#\/schema\/person\/bef07b1a5005ea91c7817377119ee0b9\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/2021\/08\/06\/worry-is-a-choice\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/07\/architect.jpg\",\"articleSection\":[\"Empowerment\",\"Mindset\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/2021\/08\/06\/worry-is-a-choice\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/2021\/08\/06\/worry-is-a-choice\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/cyndicombs.com\/coaching\/2021\/08\/06\/worry-is-a-choice\/\",\"name\":\"Worry is a Choice - 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