Have you ever said this?
If you have, you are NOT alone. Most of us have said this about one thing or another at some point in our lives. If you’ve ever had an addiction, you know this feeling well.
Let’s unpack that phrase.
“I have no control of myself.”
If not you, who? Or what? Sugar? Alcohol? Gambling? Sex?
It’s different for each of us.
Literally we are saying, “something outside myself is controlling my behavior.” Usually we mean something that we “cannot resist.” I’ll use sugar in my examples because it’s been my personal drug of choice for years and I know many MANY people can relate. If sugar is not the thing you “can’t resist,” substitute, your own drug of choice while reading.
What are we really saying? Sugar controls me, or sugar thinks for me.
How true is that?
Can sugar think thoughts inside your head?
No. So really it’s only your THOUGHTS that are telling you to succumb to temptation.
So when we say, “I Have No Self-Control,” we are really saying, “I cannot control my thoughts,” or “I cannot control my mind.” Again, you would not be alone. We are rarely, if ever, taught to choose which thoughts we think.
Advertisers and politicians like it when we have little control over our own thoughts, because that makes it EASY to put thoughts in our head. Our culture does not highly value independent thinking, so it’s completely normal to not be adept at guiding our thought energy.
Thoughts are energy.
Where do you spend yours? Doubting your ability to resist something? Or shifting your focus to choices that align with your own healthy intentions?
There is no right or wrong here.
I am simply bringing awareness to the process.
What’s really True?
Self-control comes from being aware. Become aware of what you are really thinking and then you get to CHOOSE.
Self-empowerment comes from choosing which thoughts to think. Once we are aware of what we are thinking, we get to decide if we want to keep thinking that thought, or change it to something that builds our energy instead of depletes it.
So, “I can’t resist sugar!” becomes something gentler like, “Oh how interesting. I am thinking about sugar again. That does NOT align with my healthy intentions or my goals, so I choose to shift my thinking.” And then we get to choose an infinite number of thoughts that align with our healthy intentions. Here are some possible substitutes:
I am powerfully aligned with my healthy intentions!
I choose to eat foods from my list of delicious nutritious choices!
I can change my focus to some form of creativity that I enjoy!
I can distract myself until the urge passes.
I choose my own thoughts and control my own behaviors.
I am a powerful being and I will not defeat myself thinking thoughts I do not wan to think!
PLEASE list more options in the comments! What thought do YOU choose to think instead of, “I can’t resist XYZ,” or “I Have No Self-Control!”
The photo at top is SUGAR FREE Raspberry Ripple!!
Click this link for recipe from I Quit Sugar.
You didn’t think I’d be mean enough to show you a picture of something to tempt you into eating sugar, did you?