Give it up!

I recently had a conversation with a client who was pondering the fact that death is the ultimate act of release. She wisely pointed out that some things are easier to release than others, and I am inspired by the way she is actively practicing letting go in different areas of life. 

All humans have attachments. That’s completely normal. However the more attached we are, the more we fight to hold on to the thing we are attached to.

When we become truly attached to something, we will fight to keep it even when it damages our wellbeing.  The thought of losing it creates distress and anxiety. For example, for the alcoholic, the thought of living without daily alcohol may cause panic, even if she is aware that the alcohol is damaging her health in many ways.

Some people remain in abusive relationships because they cannot imagine a life without the person who is abusing them. Some people choose to remain in extremely stressful jobs that cause health problems because they can’t imagine earning their big salary any other way. We can become attached to all kinds of beliefs that create fear and anxiety. (I’m not ‘whatever’ – smart, thin, rich, worthy, healthy, pretty, educated, experienced – enough.)

An infinite variety of manufactured foods deplete our energy and damage our health. These have been designed specifically to be addicting in order to drive up corporate profits. People often reach for these addictive foods to soothe themselves long after we realize the effect that food is having on our health. It’s hard to give up a food or an addiction that makes us feel better!

Habitual thoughts and behaviors can also limit our potential for optimum happiness and wellbeing. Judgement and self-criticism are two of the biggest limiting behaviors that humans develop by way of constant cultural conditioning.

Give it up!

I know it’s not easy to release something that is woven into the fabric of our lives! However, I invite you to begin playing with letting go of whatever it is that’s limiting you. If there is something you can’t imagine your life without, I encourage you to begin imagining your life without it.

Play with letting go of judgement and criticism and see how it feels. What happens to your energy? Your mood? Imagine doing the kind of job that leaves you happy and satisfied at the end of the day. What would that look like for you? I’m not asking you to figure out HOW to leave your crappy job and find a lucrative career you adore, I’m just inviting you to imagine that it is POSSIBLE.

Imagination is the first step of manifestation.

Practice letting go of anything that no longer serves you. If your food choices are not helping you manifest optimum health, practice letting go of some of those foods for awhile to see how you feel. You can always go back to those foods later if you want, but at least allow yourself to experience what it’s like to let them go for a few weeks. What’s the worst that could happen? You might feel better!

Do you HATE to work out, and prefer being sedentary? Imagine yourself deeply enjoying some FUN kind of movement that feels good to your body. I’m not asking you to go join a gym, I’m asking you to imagine yourself enjoying movement. I’m encouraging you to give up the idea that you hate moving your body. Play with some new ways to move that MIGHT feel good to you, and just IMAGINE doing them for awhile. Maybe you’ll get inspired to move. What’s the worst that could happen? You might really have fun!

When we play with letting go of anything that limits us, we can begin optimizing our health, wealth, and unlimited potential!

Grow on!

What’s holding you back?
What habitual patterns would you love to release? 
What does it feel like when you imagine releasing them?
What are you ready to release?
What are you ready to IMAGINE yourself releasing?
How will your life be different when you release that?

Need some help?
If you want help releasing what’s holding you back, schedule a chat with me to see if coaching can help you move from where you are to where you’d LOVE to be!

I am the Light.

I have been feeling a little stressed lately. Thinking about family worries, financial setbacks, and fading friendships has left me feeling a bit depleted. Unexpected and unwelcome changes to holiday plans left me feeling picked on because my expectations weren’t met. Why is it always ME that has to compromise?

Honestly I was feeling disappointed, and slightly victimized.

My friend and mentor, encouraged me to think about how I want to FEEL on a daily basis throughout the holidays, and suggested I choose a word or phrase to use as a guiding light through the coming weeks.

Thinking about that, I decided that I want to feel my power. I want to feel the way I feel when I am connected to Source energy, and letting the Light of undiluted Love flow through me! And I want that for everyone else, too. I want to see pure positive energy – the Light of unconditional Love – spread like wildfire across the globe. 

I am the Light.

THAT is how I wish to feel throughout the holidays and into the New Years, and decades ahead! I am the Light.

When I am the Light, I cannot feel disappointment or fear. I simply shine from within. I shine with infinite Source energy. I am not bound by limiting expectations, because all I expect is illumination – no matter my direction of travel.

Jesus talks about not putting one’s light under a bushel but making it visible for all to see. Christianity says Christ is the light in all beings. Science talks of photons or light waves being present in every atom in the universe. Buddhism says Buddha is always shining, always emitting light. Buddha said, “Be you lamps unto yourselves.”  
Daily Meditations

I am the Light.

This is my mantra for the holiday season, and coming year.

I am the Light.

When I feel powerless,
I choose to step into my power – the Truth of Who I am. I am Goddess, Source Energy, the energy that creates worlds, and I am neither powerless, nor victim.
Not fucking EVER.

I am the Light.

I CHOOSE to be the Light.
I choose to SHINE.
I choose to love – unconditionally.
I choose Faith.
I choose to TRUST that the Universe has my back.
I choose to BELIEVE that everything turns out for the highest good, even when my human mind cannot see HOW it is good.
I choose to believe that I am worthy, and so is everyone else, even when I feel crappy.
I choose to spend time in nature because it feeds my soul.
I follow the Light within.
I am the Light I see in reflected in my world.
I am the Light, and I choose to fucking SHINE!

I am the Light.

Please remember that YOU, too, are the Light. 

Winter Solstice is the darkest time of year. Let’s give ourselves, and each other the gift of being the Light. I wish you a new year full of health, abundance, opportunities, and blessings.

Let there be Light.

EXCELLENT fucking reasons!

When I was little, I used to lie on my grandma’s bed and listen to music on her clock radio. I was mesmerized watching the numbers flip over one minute, and hour at at a time. To a four-year-old, it seemed like magic.

In first grade they tried to teach me how to tell time using hands on a clock. I didn’t get it. Partially because I hadn’t yet been taught to multiply by five, and partially because it seemed redundant when you could just look at a magical flip clock and see the answer to what time it was if you cared to know.

My teacher sent home an angry note disparaging my analog time-telling talents. My father was furious that I was behind in this lesson. I cheerfully explained to him that it was ok, because I could get a flip-clock like grandma’s so I could always tell what time it was. He did not appreciate my optimism, and let his fury fly. 

He sat me down at our dining table and slammed the worksheet down in front of me.  I worked out the time on the clocks on the worksheet, and for every incorrect answer, I got smacked.

After my first wrong answer, a furious voice arose in my mind, “Do NOT get one more wrong! Do not answer until you KNOW you are correct!” I was very careful and found that when I applied myself, I could avoid the wrath. The protector in my mind helped me survive.

Over the years, the voice that arose to protect me from wrath was generally the first to hurl it. Any mistake I made was met with choruses of vehement anger. HOW could I be so stupid as to make one mistake? I am SUCH an idiot! Will I NEVER learn?

The protection from wrong answers transformed into criticism for everything that SEEMED like it MIGHT be in error. It was easy to be anxious and uncertain, and then not even try if I was the least bit unsure of myself.

I’m not telling this story to gain sympathy, I tell it to illustrate the fact that I have excellent fucking reasons for the critical voice in my head telling me NOT to fuck this up. And, I am willing to bet that if you hear constant nagging criticism in the back of your mind, you have excellent fucking reasons, too.

I also know that if you hear constant nagging criticism in the back of your mind, you’re dealing with one of the biggest stressors in life. It’s no fun, it wreaks havoc with our digestion, and it’s one of the biggest reasons that women overeat, or turn to sugary treats.

That’s right. You heard me.

If you, like millions of other women struggle with overeating or overuse of sugar, one of the biggest reasons may be the voice in your head telling you you’re a loser for reaching for the sugar again! 

So, we have excellent fucking reasons for the critical voices in our heads, AND that may be one of the major causes underlying compulsive eating patterns that we deeply desire to release. 

What can we do about this confusing challenge?

It’s pretty clear that we want to learn to stop being so critical of ourselves, but how do we begin to release a habit that has lasted a lifetime? It’s a process, and it takes practice!

It’s not going to happen overnight despite the critical voice telling us that our life depends on making changes NOW, or that we should have made changes yesterday. Often, just hearing the voice saying that something MUST be done is enough to induce our anxiety.

Take a deep breath, and exhale fully.

Changing the voice in our head is not only possible, it is essential, and it is life changing! Go ahead and take another deep breath, because just knowing that change is possible begins to relieve the tension – as does breathing deeply.

Somewhere to begin.

Here is a simple process I teach my clients to begin letting go of the inner critic, and ALL the stress she causes us to feel!

ABC Process

Awareness
Practice becoming aware when it’s happening. For many people, it’s simply a sudden feeling of being judged or disapproved of. For others, it’s hearing full sentences of disapproval and harsh judgement. It can be different for each of us, so we need to pay attention to try and catch it in the moment we are doing it.

Once we are aware in the moment that it’s happening, we can take action. As soon as you are aware of the critic voice:

Breathe
Take a nice deep grounding breath.

Choose 
Choose love.
Choose a voice who speaks gently to you.
Choose to treat yourself as you would treat someone you adore, someone you would never criticize.

Instead of criticizing yourself, choose to love yourself for being human.

It’s as simple as ABC, though it takes some practice to become aware and remember to do it in the moment. And if you don’t catch it in the moment, don’t beat yourself up. 

When you do catch it with your improving Awareness – Breathe, and Choose love!

Somewhere to practice.

Letting go of the constant self-criticism takes time and practice. Three times a year, I run a two-month group for women who are ready to release self-criticism and get relief from stress, and the myriad symptoms that stress creates in our lives. We also release recreational sugar for three weeks in a fully supported, nonjudgmental way to see how much RELIEF we can create from any unwanted symptoms we are experiencing. 

If this sounds like something you want to play with, you can sign up for the next Masterclass at THIS LINK, or read all the information about the upcoming Playgroup HERE.

Grow on!

Print the ABC process somewhere you will see it daily to help remind you to let go of self-criticism.

Check out full details of the next Relief through Release Playgroup at THIS LINK.

Remember that you are WORTH the investment of time and energy that it takes to be kinder to yourself!

Nope, nope, nope!

Millions of thoughts pop into our heads every day. Some of them are constructive, and some, not so much. Some of them feel wonderful, and some create fear. Some inspire confidence, others manifest self-doubt. 

The trick is to remember that if they pop in uninvited,
you only need to entertain the ones you enjoy!

I talk to my clients all the time about “milking the moment” when they have a thought that feels wonderful. We want to hang onto those as long as we can, and really milk them for every drop of pleasure that we can get. 

Why? Because energy attracts like energy.

The more we focus on what we enjoy, the more the Universe brings us to enjoy!

So what about those thoughts that pop in unannounced that are destructive, fear filled, and confidence crushing? My advice is to get rid of them the instant we become aware of them.

It’s perfectly understandable, when experiencing a financial or medical uncertainty, that scary thoughts and worst case scenarios might pop into out head. But these thoughts are here without invitation, so we don’t throw them a big party and invite them to stay!

As soon as I notice that my mind has wandered into a scary neighborhood, I quickly repeat “nope, nope, nope!” It’s like a little energy canceling mantra I use to retrieve my energy from unwanted territory. The quicker I can catch myself, and redirect with “nope, nope, nope” the better! 

Why? Because energy attracts like energy.

The more we focus on what is unwanted, the more the Universe brings us what is unwanted!

Of course we occasionally must focus on something we’d rather not, like preparing our taxes. But I’m talking about creating stories in our head of unreal events that may never happen. It’s a HUGE, and completely unnecessary, waste of our energy. The faster we vacate that territory, the calmer, happier, and more energized we will feel!

Nope, nope, nope!

Then we can intentionally shift attention onto something we DO want to attract. We can entertain best case scenarios and visualize those. Or if the energy is currently too charged around that topic, shift subjects entirely and focus on something that is sure to lift your energy and inspire you. Your grandkids, your pet, crafts or hobbies, podcasts meant to inspire. Whatever it is for you.

After the nope, nope, nope disrupts the negative energy, focus on anything that allows you to feel uplifted, happy, empowered, or inspired.

Grow on!

What thoughts are you currently entertaining that could use a good “Nope, nope, nope!”?

Create a list of as many people, places, and practices you can think of that never fail to comfort you, or make you feel amazing.

For an incomplete list of resources that inspire the crap outta me & my clients so we can energize our lives & thrive, check out my fabulous fucking toy box at THIS LINK!

Overeating & Shame ~ Break the Cycle

Overeating is NOT a willpower problem. Overeating is NOT a personal failing! Overeating is rooted in science. If we are overeating, there are almost always biological reasons.

We are not weak willed. We are not broken.
There is nothing wrong with us that needs fixing.

This means we can let go of the SHAME of overeating!

This means there is no need to beat up on ourselves as most humans tend to do. Overeating and shame are as intertwined as a blackberry bramble, and ten times as injurious.

Once we address the scientific reasons for the overeating and untangle the shame, the behavior diminishes greatly, and loses it’s power.

Overeating is rooted in


The brain is biologically wired to scream HUNGRY when nutritional needs are not being met. We are biologically driven to answer that need, even if we just ate a full meal.


Let’s look at some common reasons the brain might decide our nutritional needs have not been met, and scream HUNGRY, triggering us to eat more.

STRESS

The human response to stress is fight or flight. Our stress response moves energy AWAY from digestion so that it can be used to fight or flee. This leads to nutrient wasting.  Our brain is scanning for nutrients, but if the nutrients we’re eating are being excreted because we are chronically stressed out, we MUST eat more to satisfy nutritional needs.

FAST EATING

Eating fast means that our brain does not have the required time to register the meal and the nutrients we take in. The brain’s requirements are not met, and it tells us in no uncertain terms that we are HUNGRY and we MUST eat more.

LOW CALORIES/STRINGENT DIETING

Calorie requirements vary day to day depending on activity levels and more. Our brain is scanning for adequate energy, but if we are restricting calories, we naturally feel HUNGRY if we have not provided enough fuel. 

When we are restricting calories to a point where we do not have enough fuel, doesn’t it make complete sense that the brain will scream HUNGRY?

MISSING MACRONUTRIENTS

Macronutrients are food types required in large amounts to survive.
Carbohydrates – grains, potatoes, fruits & veggies, and refined sugars
Proteins – meat, fish, eggs, nuts, beans, and seeds
Healthy Fats = Essential Fatty Acids – fish, seeds, nuts, avocados, olives, coconut

Essential Fatty Acids:

  • are essential building block of hormones
  • regulate brain & nervous system
  • regulate our immune system
  • have been linked to reduced rates of cancer and heart disease
  • are vital to reproductive function.  Conception and viable pregnancy do not occur in the absence of Essential Fatty Acids.

There is a common misconception that eating fats makes us fat, but without essential fatty acids, we grow ill and die. If we are lacking in essential fatty acids, our brain screams HUNGRY and we MUST eat more.

Water is a macronutrient and makes up 60% of the human body. Our brain is scanning for nutrients. If macronutrients are found lacking – even water – the brain screams HUNGRY, and we will be BIOLOGICALLY DRIVEN to eat more even if we’re really thirsty.

LOW NUTRIENT FOODS

If we eat low quality food, or low-nutrient food, we may not be getting the nutrients required for health. Our brain is scanning for nutrients, but if we aren’t getting adequate amounts for health our brain screams HUNGRY and we naturally MUST eat more.

MEAL SKIPPING

Appetite is our friend.  Without appetite, we stop eating and we die. Skipping meals leads to being truly hungry. Appetite is the correct biological response to hunger.

Eating when hungry = Life.

Ignoring hunger and skipping meals can lead directly to overeating at the very next meal simply because we are underfed, or overeating at the end of day because we didn’t allow ourselves the time to eat when our appetite cued us to eat.

If we haven’t eaten all day, or haven’t eaten much during the day, the correct biological response is hunger. Our brain will SCREAM that we are hungry, and we will be driven to eat more.

It makes complete sense to eat when hungry, and to eat MORE when ravenous!

  • Overeating is NOT a willpower problem, nor a personal failing!
  • There are many biological reasons for overeating. I only named a few.
  • The brain will always drive the body to eat more when it determines that we are in nutritional need.
  • The brain will always drive the body to eat more when it determines that we have a deficit in energy (calories).
  • The brain will always drive the body to eat more when it determines that food is in short supply.

Since overeating is rooted in science, we can release the SHAME attached to overeating! And often when we address the underlying biological reasons, the overeating vanishes!

The Kindness Key

Once we address the biological reasons, if we are still compulsively overeating, then KINDNESS, CURIOSITY, and AWARENESS are our best allies!

Kindness First!
Remember that this is not a personal failing, nor does it have anything to do with willpower. Using food to soothe is a strategy as old as time. 

We feel bad, we eat food, we feel better. 

It’s a highly effective tactic that works every time, and you are not the only person who has figured this out. You are NOT the only human using food to soothe, I promise. The problems arise when we use food to soothe too frequently, AND… when we feel shame about the behavior.

When we use overeating frequently, it can cause a wide range of health challenges, and the shame we heap on ourselves for using this brilliant coping mechanism can do more damage than the overeating itself! 

Shame is the most toxic of all our emotions, and puts us into direct opposition of our core vibration, which is unconditional love. That’s why shame feels so ICKY.

When we are IN alignment with the energy of love – the energy at our core – we feel AMAZING. We feel energized, fired up, and ready to meet any challenge.

When we are OUT of alignment with our core energy we feel exhausted, depressed, and unmotivated. When we are in shame – the polar opposite of unconditional love – we feel as exhausted, depressed, and unmotivated as is humanly possible.

Overeating and shame can feel like an unbreakable cycle. 

We use food to soothe. We beat ourselves up for it. We feel like crap, and… we use food to soothe.

The key to break the cycle is to meet your behavior with KINDNESS instead of criticism.

I understand this may seem too simple. It seems like overeating is the issue and the bit we need to change, but we can’t change the behavior as long as we continue to beat ourselves up for the behavior (which causes hurt feelings that need soothing).

The key is kindness. We can be kind to ourselves instead of critical. We can take a deep breath and remind ourself that we are human, that we are using an effective human strategy, and that nothing has gone wrong. We can give ourself a big hug, like we might hug a friend who was dealing with challenging emotions. We can look for other ways to soothe ourself effectively. 

This is how we break the cycle.

NOT by creating more emotions that need soothing, and NOT by judging ourself bad, wrong, or unworthy just because we are human. As we begin to accept the behavior of overeating as something we do – and not as something that defines who we are – we have room to use curiosity to increase our awareness.

Kindness unlocks Curiosity!

Once we are no longer draining energy in self-criticism, we have energy to get curious about what’s really going on for us!

We can ask questions like: 

  • What triggered the overeating?
  • What thought was I thinking?
  • What emotion was I trying to soothe?
  • What was I really hungry for?
  • What would have been most nourishing for me?
  • How can I soothe myself other than with food?

Curiosity increases our Awareness!

We can become aware of when, where, what, and why we are overeating. We can cultivate awareness about what we’re thinking on a regular basis, and which thoughts seem to drive us toward overeating. Without the judgement and criticism occupying our energy and attention, we can see what’s really going on. Awareness is always the first step in creating change, so if we want to change a behavior, we want to get curious about it and grow our awareness.

Overeating is rooted in science, so we can use the key of kindness to release the shame, unlock our curiosity, and grow our awareness. With our awareness, the behavior loses it’s power, and we are free to choose change, if we wish to change.

Grow on!

If you are overeating, you are not alone.

  • Which biological causes of overeating can you play with to help release the behavior?
  • When you hear the inner critic, how possible is it to take a deep breath, and choose kindness?
  • Get Curious in your journal:
    • What triggered the overeating?
    • What thought was I thinking?
    • What emotion was I trying to soothe?
    • What was I really hungry for?
    • What would have been most nourishing for me?
    • How can I soothe myself other than with food?

I help clients release shame, and overeating!
My next Relief through Release Playgroup starts SOON!

Misbehaved Kittens Russian Roulette of Self-Care

YAY for triggers!

What are triggers? Triggers are a golden fucking opportunities to expand our awareness, and grow through challenge. Triggers are gifts from the Universe, pointing to that which needs our attention.

Triggers are personal to each of us, and they generally piss us off, or generate some other strong, emotional response. They’re the things that get under our skin, which DEMAND a reaction from us. Often we can’t NOT react. And frequently, looking back, we wish we had acted in some other way instead of the way we reacted.

Generally triggers are accompanied by a feeling of stress. Whether we react, or hold back the reaction we feel, stress or anxiety are activated inside us. Sometimes we also beat ourselves up for having reacted. (Why did I let them get to me? I should be past this by now! What’s wrong with me? Or similar thoughts.) This can add shame to the toxic mixture of emotions already triggered within us, and increases our perceived stress.

Humans get triggered by all sorts of things. Think repeated behaviors that annoy, like a partner dropping dirty clothes on the floor, leaving dishes in the sink, or not calling when they will be late. These behaviors don’t trigger me – and maybe not you either – but they are triggers for many people. Triggers come in all shapes and sizes. Coworkers, children, politicians, parents, or pets can all trigger us for different reasons.

Recently I was speaking with a client who has two new kittens that she adores. They are young, and energetic, and often misbehave and steal small, important objects and hide them out of reach. As we were talking, a new game popped into my head. 

What if every time the misbehaved kittens trigger frustration, we create an opportunity for self-love instead?

Misbehaved Kittens Russian Roulette of Self-Care

I suggested she make a list of everything she considers self-care, write each item on a slip of paper, and place the slips of paper into a hat, a fishbowl, or a fancy box. Then every time the kittens misbehave, she reaches into the fishbowl and pulls out a self-care prize, instead of shooting herself in the foot with stress, reactivity, blame, and shame. 

She loved the idea, and so do I!
I encourage everyone to play.

The game allows us to be triggered into self care, and replace stress-building reactions with desirable actions that reduce stress and build healthy habits! Of course you don’t need misbehaved kittens to play. You could play Annoying Coworker Russian Roulette of Self-Care, or Inattentive Spouse Russian Roulette of Self-Care, or my current personal favorite, Puppy Poops on the Carpet Russian Roulette of Self-Care.

So how do you define self-care?

Anything qualifies that makes YOU feel cared for, held, and supported. The header contains lots of great possibilities for self-care, and below is a short list. I encourage you to personalize your list to include your favorites, and only use those that truly resonate for you. Some women love to get pedicures and look forward to them as a pampering treatment. Others find them tedious, and don’t enjoy having their feet touched. There is no right or wrong. It’s about whatever makes you feel calm, relaxed, cared for, and loved. 

Self-Care possibilities:

Make a gratitude list.
Dance for 5 to 10 minutes.
Schedule a massage.
Journal.
Get a mani-pedi.
Journal while you get a mani-pedi.
Fix a cup of your favorite tea.
Take a nap.
Sing your favorite song, and really belt it out.
Do some mirror work.
Take 10 slow deep breaths.
Take a 10 minute yoga break.
Sit in the jacuzzi.
Take a walk.
Spend time in the sun.
Write yourself a love note.
Go to bed early.
Call an uplifting friend.
Look at beautiful photos of nature.
Create art.

Grow on!

Make your own list of self-care.
Write each item on a slip of paper.
Place them in a container that pleases you.
Now when you feel triggered, you can choose to react by reaching for self-care.

Header image photo credit – Thanks to Western Oregon University!

Even on Shitty Days

I don’t feel like writing a fucking blog post today. I don’t see any sunny side at the moment. I am not inspired, nor do I feel inspiring. My dog had surgery yesterday and kept me awake all night trying to get the cone off his head. I have a tension headache the size of Montana. My spine is out of alignment causing me to be off work, so my finances feel out of alignment. My perspective is out of alignment with my higher self, and my human is screaming WTF?! 

I don’t even want to listen to my favorite podcast to try and lift my vibe! What’s wrong with me?! WHY is everything going wrong? What did I DO to deserve this mess!?

Fuck! Fuckity fuck fuckitall!

I rest my head in my hands, rub my temples and take a deep breath. When I find I haven’t the energy to scream, I exhale with force through gritted teeth. 

In that small, quiet space following my exhale, I can hear my higher being for just a moment, just long enough to whisper my new mantra to me.

Nothing has gone wrong.
Everything is perfect.
All is well.

“Well it sure doesn’t FEEL as if all is fucking well,” I retort with just as much snark as I can muster. But I have softened. Just a bit, but enough. 

I know enough to know that even if I can’t see the gift (the lesson my soul is hungry to learn) in the moment, my new mantra is right. Nothing ever goes wrong. All goes according to Divine plan. I trust the Universe to have my back, which means I can relax, and right now relaxation is exactly what I need.

Nothing has gone wrong.

I am simply having a human experience – not good nor bad – just human. Sometimes we get out of alignment with our highest self, and that’s ok! That’s part of the plan, to get out of alignment and find our way back. And it’s fine if I don’t want to find my way back right this minute! We can always learn something from spending time in misalignment. Sometimes we learn it in the moment, and sometimes we learn in hindsight, but simply remembering that nothing has gone wrong, allows us to relax a bit, allows the resistance to soften.

I’m still exhausted from not sleeping, but I am no longer shoulding on myself. I don’t beat myself up for being out of alignment. I accept it as part of being human, part of my experience, and give myself a fucking break!

In fact, I do deserve a break. I think I’ll schedule a massage, and if any voices in my head try to tell me I don’t deserve it, they can fuck right the hell off.

Yeah. I’m feeling better!

Practice my new mantra for awhile if it feels good to you. 

Or find a mantra that reminds you of your power and practice that.
I find that it really helps. Especially on the shitty days. 

WTF is a Mind Body Eating Coach?

I am super excited to be a Certified Mind Body Eating Coach trained at the Institute for the Psychology of Eating!

As I discussed in my post, Who the Fuck Needs a Life Coach, not everyone is familiar with professional coaching, so it’s sometimes necessary to explain what coaching is, how it works, and who coaching can help.  Beyond that, it may be easy to identify what a business coach, nutrition coach, or fitness coach does – and who might hire them – but what the fuck is a Mind Body Eating Coach?

I’m glad you asked!

While an eating coach might sound like someone Joey Chestnut would hire, a Certified Mind Body Eating Coach helps people who struggle with weight, body image, low-energy, digestive issues, or compulsive eating behaviors like stress eating, overeating, and binge eating.  

Mind Body Eating Coaching (MBEC) addresses the nutritional aspect of what’s going on for the client, but our sessions also focus on the personal, emotional, and psychological aspects of what may be driving unwanted eating behaviors.

MBEC training is a nine-month course of study focused on Mind Body Nutrition, and Dynamic Eating Psychology. According to the school’s founder, Marc David, “Mind Body Nutrition takes the science of nutrition to a whole new place, and Dynamic Eating Psychology is a positive, results-oriented approach to eating concerns that speaks to heart, mind and soul.”

A Certified Mind Body Eating Coach is not going to offer you a specific eating plan, nor exercise program, though she may help you create one specific to your body.  MBE Coaching helps clients get to the root of why we do the things we do, and why we do what we don’t want to do.

This unique approach offers a pathway to finally heal our relationship with food and body that is different from anything I’ve ever experienced, and I’m willing to bet most of my readers have never tried anything like this before either.

So WHO might hire a Mind Body Eating Coach?

Those who will benefit from Mind Body Eating Coaching are those who wish to:

  • Replace endless dieting with lifelong nourished eating.
  • Release unwanted, or compulsive eating behaviors.
  • Find a natural and sustainable way of eating that suits their own body.
  • Savor life instead of rushing from one moment to the next.
  • Feel confident in the skin they’re in, instead of feeling worried about what they weigh.

Here’s what my current clients are saying about Mind Body Eating Coaching:

“Even though I have had only 2 coaching sessions with Cyndi, I cannot believe what a difference it has already made with myself as a whole. The week following my first session was amazing. I was able to actually have calm peaceful moments, (which I have not had since my husband passed almost 3 years ago). I am so looking forward to where my next sessions lead me.” ~ ST in Vallejo

After only two months, my insatiable desire to snack after dinner is almost completely gone. I can’t believe it was this easy. I thought I was eating a healthy low fat diet, and it turns out THAT was why I couldn’t stop snacking! I’m eating more food, and I am starting to release excess weight!” ~ SL in San Francisco

“Cyndi is a great coach- she’s patient with her clients as they learn.  She’s funny, insightful, informative and easy to work with. I like how she celebrates the smallest “aha” moments as she guides you in your journey.” ~ PC in Vallejo

“Cyndi has been very helpful in keeping me focused and keeping me grounded and bringing me back to earth when I lose it. She has taught me a lot about enjoying what I’m eating and being mindful when it’s meal time. I derive great enjoyment from our sessions. I find them very useful and Cyndi very uplifting” ~ BK in Pinole

Please forward this blog post to anyone you know who might like to:
– Replace endless dieting with lifelong nourished eating.
– Release unwanted, or compulsive eating behaviors.
– Find a natural and sustainable way of eating that suits their own body.
– Savor life instead of rushing from one moment to the next.
– Feel confident in the skin they’re in, instead of feeling worried about what they weigh.

What do you have to lose?

Grow on!

If you’re considering hiring a coach, please use THIS LINK to schedule a chat to see if I’m the right coach for you!

Stop and Smell the Fucking Roses

Today would have been my grandmother’s one hundred eleventh birthday. She’s been gone since the late nineties, and I still miss her, but I never focus on her being gone.  I always think how blessed I was to have her wonderful energy in my life.  

Life is full of challenges that demand our time and energy. Sometimes they grab our attention so hard that for awhile that challenge is all we can think about. In our minds, we slow time and chew our options.  The subject constantly pops up uninvited. We may lie awake at night turning it over and over. When it slips out of mind, we almost reach to bring it back because we miss the familiar vibration.

I want us to learn to savor every blessing, every success, every step achieved toward our goal, every tiny triumph with the same single-minded focus that we use to worry!

Why?

The things that we look at, and think about are the things life brings us.

When we focus on hardship or challenge, Life brings us hardships and challenges.  When we focus on what we love and enjoy, Life brings us love and enjoyment. I want us to celebrate everything we love, and get infinitely MORE to love.

I want us to stop and smell the fucking roses!

I feel like roses are literally an invitation from Life to slow down enough to enjoy what’s right in front of us. Not all roses have scent anymore since they have been bred for beauty, so when we find a scented rose, it’s a moment to enjoy.  Let’s stop and enjoy it!

We’re always in such a hurry to rush into the next challenge that we often forget to celebrate finding a solution for the previous challenge. We can get so focused on the larger puzzle that we fail to give ourselves credit for all the pieces we’ve already fit neatly into place.  

If we have a goal to take a fabulous vacation, I invite us to enjoy thinking about it every chance we get! We want to enjoy exploring the area with Google image searches. We want to research fun places to stay, and activities we might enjoy and imagine ourselves being there.  We want to savor the trip long before it begins!

Equally, we can savor the trip long after it ends.  The moments that brought the greatest joy can be brought back to enjoy and appreciate until the day we die, if we invite them in to lift our hearts and delight us again.  We want to milk those special moments for all the pleasure, all the upliftment we can get.

If we have a goal to drop some excess weight, I invite us to celebrate every step in that direction.  Make a different choice for breakfast?  Do a happy dance! Stick to our food plan for the day?  Celebrate! Did we slow down to be present with our meals? That’s a HUGE win!  Woo hoo!  

Why wait to celebrate once the whole goal is reached, when we have the opportunity to create MORE success by acknowledging and celebrating every decision in service of that goal? When we applaud every step we make in that direction, Life brings us more success to applaud.

When we slow down to appreciate the roses, we get more roses.

Grow on!

In what ways do you celebrate success?
What milestones are you ready to celebrate?

My Lucky Day!

I read an article somewhere about 40 years ago that explained that people who expected bad luck on Friday the 13th often found bad luck, while those who did not expect bad luck rarely find that Friday unlucky.  I decided then and there the I would not expect bad luck on Friday the 13th.  I took it one step further when I decided to dub Friday the 13th my own personal lucky day.  Since then I have had many happy encounters on Friday the 13th, in fact my first child was conceived on Friday the 13th.

Around that same time I also read an article that explained that symmetry was one of the markers for beauty in human faces.  The more symmetrical the face, the more attractive other humans find it.  In fact currently Wikipedia says “Facial symmetry has been found to increase ratings of attractiveness in human faces. More symmetrical faces are perceived as more attractive in both males and females, but facial symmetry plays a larger role in judgments of attractiveness concerning female faces.”

I agreed with the concept when they trotted out photos of beautiful celebrities and started measuring and comparing the two sides of their face.  Symmetry is wonderful indeed.  Nature is symmetrical in many beautiful ways.  Symmetrical lines of architecture always draw my camera’s lens.

When I woke with Bell’s Palsy, that long-ago article was the first thing that came to my mind.  My next thought was, “I’m no longer beautiful,”  because my face was completely asymmetrical.

My smile opened many doors to me in the first fifty years of my life.  It was difficult to imagine my life could ever be the same or that people would ever see me the same magical, privileged way I had been seen when I had my symmetrical beauty.

I mistakenly believed that my value, my worth, was intrinsically tied to my physical beauty. Once I began working with my amazing energy coach, I began to see that my worth was intrinsic. My value had nothing to do with my smile.  My beauty emanates from my core vibration, not my face.  This shift in perspective improved my life in more ways than I can say.

It must be my lucky day!  After all these years it finally occurred to me that if I can just decide that Friday the Thirteenth is lucky for me, then I can just decide that asymmetry is beautiful.

Grow on!

What thoughts/beliefs/perspectives are you currently holding onto that do not serve you?
In what ways is that thought/belief/perspective limiting you?