Category: Stress Release

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Maintaining My HIGH Vibe!

I encourage clients to do whatever the fuck they need to do to raise their vibration, and keep it high as frequently as possible.

Cyndi’s Fabulous Fucking Toy Box is overflowing with resources that inspire the crap outta me & my clients so we can energize our lives & thrive. These are just a few ideas, and I highly encourage everyone to identify the people, places, and activities that infuse their life with joy and leave them feeling energized and eager for life!

Walking my Talk

Because I practice what I preach, I am spending this weekend in McKinleyville at the beach. When it comes to things that raise MY vibe, nature is numero uno. ‘Beach’ happens to be my favorite category of nature, so I try to incorporate it into my life as often as possible.

Something else that maintains my vibe is spending time with my daughter and grandson, so they’ve come to the beach with me!

You’re worth it!

Go to the beach. Rent a house with a water view. Go for a hike in the Redwoods. Spend time with the people you love. Write a poem. Sing a song. Enjoy a sunset. Paint the sunrise. Spend your time and money doing things that charge your fucking batteries.

We are infinite beings with eternal lives. WHY did we choose to come here, if not to enjoy our time on this beautiful planet?

Grow on!

What truly brings your heart joy?
What’s keeping you from doing that?
When can you schedule an opportunity to allow some joy?

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Hooked on Sugar

If processed sugar seems like a monkey on your back, a habit that has you HOOKED, or a problem that erodes your energy, and leaves you feeling powerless, I assure you:

  1. You are NOT alone. 
  2. It’s NOT a personal failing.
  3. It’s not your fault.
  4. You are not experiencing optimal health.
  5. It is possible to get OFF the hook.

You are NOT alone. 

A recent study suggests Americans eat far too much sugar. To be specific, approximately 75% of Americans eat excess amounts of sugar — many of whom could be classified as having a sugar addiction. 

~ Addiction Center

It’s NOT a personal failing.

Research on rats has found that sugar is more addictive than drugs such as cocaine, and that there can be withdrawal symptoms such as depression and behavioral problems when people try cutting out sugar completely. 

~ Ramsay Health

Sugar fuels every cell in the brain. Your brain also sees sugar as a reward, which makes you keep wanting more of it. If you often eat a lot of sugar, you’re reinforcing that reward, which can make it tough to break the habit.

~ WebMD

It’s not your fault.

You cannot crave and think clearly at the same time! Healthy decision-making is switched off when you are craving.  

~ Dr. Joan Ifland

This is NOT your fault.
Where the addiction comes from.

You are not experiencing optimal health.

Too much added sugar can be one of the greatest threats to cardiovascular health.

~ Harvard Health

Everyone knows that sugar can rot teeth, and that it’s high calorie content packs on excess weight rather quickly.

Sugar also affects physical and mental health in far more dangerous ways that may not be obvious until the damage is done.

Numerous studies link eating processed sugar to:

  • Chronic inflammation
  • High blood pressure
  • Cancer
  • Polycystic ovary syndrome
  • Heart disease
  • Dementia
  • Non-alcoholic fatty liver disease
  • Insulin resistance
  • Lipid problems
  • Type 2 diabetes
  • Depression
  • Increased stress

How does too much sugar affect your body?

It is possible to get OFF the hook.

Since sugar can be addicting, and cause withdrawal symptoms when we try to quit, it may seem like an impossible task to get the sugar monkey off our back. Letting go of habits can be tricky, especially when dopamine is involved. But I’m here to tell you, releasing sugar is not only possible, it’s absolutely liberating! 

How is it possible to get relief from sugar cravings, and other unwanted symptoms caused or exacerbated by refined sugars?

By releasing the foods, thoughts, and behaviors that keep us hooked in a habitual loop of swearing off sugar, followed by bingeing on sugar, followed by self loathing, and soothing with sugar.

Relief through Release Playgroup

I specifically designed R&R Playgroup to support women who want to play with releasing sugar for the purpose of improving our health! Participants have created relief from sugar cravings, overeating, excess weight, and other unwanted symptoms.

It is possible to free oneself from processed sugar – and the toxic effects it has on the human body – by combining certain crucial requirements.

Making a plan, and preparing are crucial. During the first phase of R&R Playgroup, we spend three weeks planning what to eat and not to eat, and preparing ourselves mentally and psychologically to release sugar temporarily.

Releasing self-criticism is crucial. This is an ongoing theme throughout R&R Playgroup because I do not believe it is possible to release foods that we enjoy when we are constantly being criticized by anyone.

Temporarily abstaining from sugar is crucial. The second phase of R&R Playgroup is when we experiment with abstaining from sugar for twenty-one days.

Constant Support in community is crucial. Daily support is a consistently proven way to release habitual patterns that are not serving us. During the second phase of R&R Playgroup, we meet daily on Zoom for 21 days. 

It is invaluable to be seen and understood by a community who understands the depth of the challenge you face, and celebrates every success and triumph along your journey!

Learning to regulate our emotions is crucial. One of the number one reasons humans turn to sugar and overeating is the desire to soothe uncomfortable emotions. Learning healthy ways to regulate emotions is a major component of R&R Playgroup.

Coaching and time to integrate what’s learned is crucial. Learning something is different than integrating it. Phase three of R&R Playgroup is about integrating the data we collected during our experiment, and using it to create a road map that aligns us with our own healthy intentions as we move forward.

Freeing ourselves from lifelong habits like self-criticism, or daily sugar use is exponentially easier when we have a solid plan, constant support, educational reminders, an encouraging coach, and a community that understands the enormity of our challenge, and supports and celebrates our journey.

If you or someone you know is interested in getting unhooked from sugar, you can find all the information at THIS LINK, or sign up for the next Masterclass to learn MORE at THIS LINK.

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I am the Light.

I have been feeling a little stressed lately. Thinking about family worries, financial setbacks, and fading friendships has left me feeling a bit depleted. Unexpected and unwelcome changes to holiday plans left me feeling picked on because my expectations weren’t met. Why is it always ME that has to compromise?

Honestly I was feeling disappointed, and slightly victimized.

My friend and mentor, encouraged me to think about how I want to FEEL on a daily basis throughout the holidays, and suggested I choose a word or phrase to use as a guiding light through the coming weeks.

Thinking about that, I decided that I want to feel my power. I want to feel the way I feel when I am connected to Source energy, and letting the Light of undiluted Love flow through me! And I want that for everyone else, too. I want to see pure positive energy – the Light of unconditional Love – spread like wildfire across the globe. 

I am the Light.

THAT is how I wish to feel throughout the holidays and into the New Years, and decades ahead! I am the Light.

When I am the Light, I cannot feel disappointment or fear. I simply shine from within. I shine with infinite Source energy. I am not bound by limiting expectations, because all I expect is illumination – no matter my direction of travel.

Jesus talks about not putting one’s light under a bushel but making it visible for all to see. Christianity says Christ is the light in all beings. Science talks of photons or light waves being present in every atom in the universe. Buddhism says Buddha is always shining, always emitting light. Buddha said, “Be you lamps unto yourselves.”  
– Daily Meditations

I am the Light.

This is my mantra for the holiday season, and coming year.

I am the Light.

When I feel powerless,
I choose to step into my power – the Truth of Who I am. I am Goddess, Source Energy, the energy that creates worlds, and I am neither powerless, nor victim.
Not fucking EVER.

I am the Light.

I CHOOSE to be the Light.
I choose to SHINE.
I choose to love – unconditionally.
I choose Faith.
I choose to TRUST that the Universe has my back.
I choose to BELIEVE that everything turns out for the highest good, even when my human mind cannot see HOW it is good.
I choose to believe that I am worthy, and so is everyone else, even when I feel crappy.
I choose to spend time in nature because it feeds my soul.
I follow the Light within.
I am the Light I see in reflected in my world.
I am the Light, and I choose to fucking SHINE!

I am the Light.

Please remember that YOU, too, are the Light. 

Winter Solstice is the darkest time of year. Let’s give ourselves, and each other the gift of being the Light. I wish you a new year full of health, abundance, opportunities, and blessings.

Let there be Light.

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EXCELLENT fucking reasons!

When I was little, I used to lie on my grandma’s bed and listen to music on her clock radio. I was mesmerized watching the numbers flip over one minute, and hour at at a time. To a four-year-old, it seemed like magic.

In first grade they tried to teach me how to tell time using hands on a clock. I didn’t get it. Partially because I hadn’t yet been taught to multiply by five, and partially because it seemed redundant when you could just look at a magical flip clock and see the answer to what time it was if you cared to know.

My teacher sent home an angry note disparaging my analog time-telling talents. My father was furious that I was behind in this lesson. I cheerfully explained to him that it was ok, because I could get a flip-clock like grandma’s so I could always tell what time it was. He did not appreciate my optimism, and let his fury fly. 

He sat me down at our dining table and slammed the worksheet down in front of me.  I worked out the time on the clocks on the worksheet, and for every incorrect answer, I got smacked.

After my first wrong answer, a furious voice arose in my mind, “Do NOT get one more wrong! Do not answer until you KNOW you are correct!” I was very careful and found that when I applied myself, I could avoid the wrath. The protector in my mind helped me survive.

Over the years, the voice that arose to protect me from wrath was generally the first to hurl it. Any mistake I made was met with choruses of vehement anger. HOW could I be so stupid as to make one mistake? I am SUCH an idiot! Will I NEVER learn?

The protection from wrong answers transformed into criticism for everything that SEEMED like it MIGHT be in error. It was easy to be anxious and uncertain, and then not even try if I was the least bit unsure of myself.

I’m not telling this story to gain sympathy, I tell it to illustrate the fact that I have excellent fucking reasons for the critical voice in my head telling me NOT to fuck this up. And, I am willing to bet that if you hear constant nagging criticism in the back of your mind, you have excellent fucking reasons, too.

I also know that if you hear constant nagging criticism in the back of your mind, you’re dealing with one of the biggest stressors in life. It’s no fun, it wreaks havoc with our digestion, and it’s one of the biggest reasons that women overeat, or turn to sugary treats.

That’s right. You heard me.

If you, like millions of other women struggle with overeating or overuse of sugar, one of the biggest reasons may be the voice in your head telling you you’re a loser for reaching for the sugar again! 

So, we have excellent fucking reasons for the critical voices in our heads, AND that may be one of the major causes underlying compulsive eating patterns that we deeply desire to release. 

What can we do about this confusing challenge?

It’s pretty clear that we want to learn to stop being so critical of ourselves, but how do we begin to release a habit that has lasted a lifetime? It’s a process, and it takes practice!

It’s not going to happen overnight despite the critical voice telling us that our life depends on making changes NOW, or that we should have made changes yesterday. Often, just hearing the voice saying that something MUST be done is enough to induce our anxiety.

Take a deep breath, and exhale fully.

Changing the voice in our head is not only possible, it is essential, and it is life changing! Go ahead and take another deep breath, because just knowing that change is possible begins to relieve the tension – as does breathing deeply.

Somewhere to begin.

Here is a simple process I teach my clients to begin letting go of the inner critic, and ALL the stress she causes us to feel!

ABC Process

Awareness
Practice becoming aware when it’s happening. For many people, it’s simply a sudden feeling of being judged or disapproved of. For others, it’s hearing full sentences of disapproval and harsh judgement. It can be different for each of us, so we need to pay attention to try and catch it in the moment we are doing it.

Once we are aware in the moment that it’s happening, we can take action. As soon as you are aware of the critic voice:

Breathe
Take a nice deep grounding breath.

Choose 
Choose love.
Choose a voice who speaks gently to you.
Choose to treat yourself as you would treat someone you adore, someone you would never criticize.

Instead of criticizing yourself, choose to love yourself for being human.

It’s as simple as ABC, though it takes some practice to become aware and remember to do it in the moment. And if you don’t catch it in the moment, don’t beat yourself up. 

When you do catch it with your improving Awareness – Breathe, and Choose love!

Somewhere to practice.

Letting go of the constant self-criticism takes time and practice. Three times a year, I run a two-month group for women who are ready to release self-criticism and get relief from stress, and the myriad symptoms that stress creates in our lives. We also release recreational sugar for three weeks in a fully supported, nonjudgmental way to see how much RELIEF we can create from any unwanted symptoms we are experiencing. 

If this sounds like something you want to play with, you can sign up for the next Masterclass at THIS LINK, or read all the information about the upcoming Playgroup HERE.

Grow on!

Print the ABC process somewhere you will see it daily to help remind you to let go of self-criticism.

Check out full details of the next Relief through Release Playgroup at THIS LINK.

Remember that you are WORTH the investment of time and energy that it takes to be kinder to yourself!

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Weight Release Requires Stress Release

A major factor in anyone’s ability to release excess weight is our ability to release stress. If we are under a lot of stress, or even chronic low-level stress, our insulin and cortisol levels rise. Increased insulin and cortisol can lead to:

  • weight gain
  • inability to lose weight
  • inability to build muscle
  • decreased calorie burning
  • increased fat deposition at midsection
  • increased inflammation – exacerbates every known disease
  • die off of good gut bacteria – leads to many types of digestive issues
  • wasting nutrients – we don’t get the nutrients from the foods we eat
  • decreased immunity – we get sick more easily
  • decreased energy
  • dysregulated appetite  – we may NOT feel hungry when we need to eat, OR we may feel hungry all the time.
  • desensitivity to pleasure – we need MORE food to feel satiated.
  • decreased Mitochondrial function – can lead to muscle weakness, and organ disease
  • decreased Thyroid function – can lead to fatigue, weight gain, joint pain, dry skin, thinning hair, irregular menses, fertility problems, slowed heart rate, or depression.
  • poor sleep quality
  • reduced sleep quantity

So it’s clear that if we want to release excess weight, we MUST find ways to RELEASE the stress we experience in our lives. 

Stress & Perception

Normal life stressors include death or illness of a family member, financial worries, work-related stress. This kind of stress can’t be avoided, but we can learn ways to diminish it, so that it has less effect on our health. We can also learn techniques to help us shift the way in which we perceive stress. Perception determines everything, and certainly colors how normal life stressors affect us. 

For example: Several employees are let go from a company.

High-stress perception of the situation says loss of income is a huge setback, we’ll fall behind on bills and maybe lose our home. Now THAT will stress you out.

Low-stress perception of the same situation says that my next income will be higher, affording more economic opportunities, and that the Universe always has my back so it was obviously time to leave that position to find something better and more fulfilling for me. What a blessing! No worries, no stress.

Self-Chosen Stress

Reducing the stress in our lives is absolutely essential if one of our goals is to release excess weight, and the stress easiest to release is the self-chosen variety. 

Are you kind to yourself like you would be to someone you love? Or do you criticize yourself for every perceived imperfection, belittle and shame yourself for not doing enough? Do you compare yourself to others and always judge yourself less than? 

When you look at your body in the mirror, do you lavish it with love and praise for supporting and sustaining you every day of your life no matter how much you abused it? Or do you heap shame on it for not looking like some swimsuit model who’s been surgically enhanced, tucked, and airbrushed?

Self-criticism and body shame create a toxic stew of stress. It’s like living in a situation where we are being attacked every day, because we are attacking ourselves daily!

Weight release requires learning to love ourselves, or at the very LEAST, learning not to treat ourselves like shit. This process takes time, patience, and constant reminders, but pays off in improved health, happiness, and more success reaching all of our goals!

Processed Foods

Perhaps one of the most treacherous self-chosen stressors in modern life is processed foods because most people choosing them don’t even know that processed foods cause stress!

The chemicals being put into manufactured foods affect our energy and our mood. According to Dr. Joan Ifland, people who eat a diet high in processed foods tend to anger more quickly, be more anxious, and irritable.

Processed foods tend to be very low in nutrition, and poor nutrition is perceived by the body as STRESS.

Poor nutrition is also a major reason that we overeat after dinner. Our body has done the calculations, found us missing essential nutrients, and sent off alarm bells that scream, “We did not get adequate nutrition. EAT MORE FOOD!”  If we reach for more processed foods, we still don’t get the nourishment our body is screaming for, but we pack on pounds from the excess empty calories. 

Here in the United States, processed foods tend to be high in many kinds of sugar, wheat flours processed with roundup, GMO corn, low quality soy, and saturated fats – ALL of which cause inflammation and have the potential to disrupt digestion.

Digesting and metabolizing even one of those inflammatory ingredients is stressful on our intestines, liver, and cardio-vascular system. Digesting many of them all at once, maybe several times a day leads to serious health issues like heart disease, high blood pressure, and diabetes.

If we eat processed foods, it’s adding stress to our life in multiple ways, and most of us aren’t even aware of it! 

Bottom line is that if we want to release any excess weight we may be carrying, we must begin to learn to release whatever stress it is within our power to release, including processed foods.

Processed Food Addiction

Now, if you are sitting there thinking that you can’t even imagine a life without processed foods, you are NOT alone. 

A recent poll done by the University of Michigan found that older adults reported intense food cravings. Twenty four percent said that at least once a week they had such a strong urge to eat a highly processed food that they couldn’t think of anything else. Nineteen percent said that at least two or three times a week they tried and failed to cut back, or stop eating, these kinds of foods.

Twelve percent said that their eating behavior caused them a lot of distress more than twice a week, so if any of this resonates for you, I hope you are starting to see that you are not the only one.

Dr Joan Ifland wrote the text book, Processed Food Addiction. You will find a wealth of interviews of Dr. Ifland on YouTube where you can learn more about processed food addiction and it’s treatment.

Elimination Diet

One of the fastest ways to get relief – from stress, inflammation, excess weight, and a long list of unwanted symptoms – is to release the thoughts, foods, and behaviors that are causing us stress, inflammation, and unwanted symptoms.

If this resonates for you, experience has shown that an elimination diet is one of the best tools for identifying foods you suspect may be causing the unwanted symptoms, and is very safe.

An elimination diet is an eating plan that omits a food, or group of foods, believed to cause unwanted symptoms. By removing foods for a few weeks and then reintroducing them during a “challenge” period, you can learn which foods are causing symptoms or making them worse.

We often think of reactions to food as happening quickly, however, many other ways our bodies react to food may not be so immediate or noticeable. 

My mission is to help people revitalize their lives and transform their lives around food and body, so I created the Relief through Release Playgroup to fully support women who want to play with releasing thoughts, foods, and behaviors that are creating unwanted symptoms, for the purpose of getting relief from those symptoms!

Relief through Release Playgroup

R&R Playgroup is an eight week online playgroup. For three weeks of those two months, we release self-criticism and sugar – two of life’s biggest stressors – with all the support it takes to make that shift.

In R&R Playgroup, we learn:

  • the science behind overeating, and create strategies to reduce overeating. 
  • to listen to our appetite instead of trying to suppress it. 
  • to tap into our body wisdom to understand what foods truly serve our health. 
  • to identify and overwrite limiting beliefs, and shift to less stressful perspectives. 
  • how to increase our energy and awareness, build confidence, and celebrate every success. 
  • to marinate our energy in thoughts and ideas that feel good and uplifting, instead of stewing in a negative vibration that diminishes everything we try to do and be! 

All of this adds up to creating the healthy energized lives that we long to lead!

The next playgroup starts in a few weeks!
Get complete details at THIS LINK.

Whether you choose to let go of self-criticism, take up yoga, learn to shift perspectives, or try an elimination diet on your own, or with a group – don’t you owe it to yourself and your health to play with some new ways to relieve stress?

Grow on!

What foods do you suspect may be causing issues for you?
What processed foods do you crave?
Which unwanted symptoms do you have that might be tied to food?
How willing are you to play with letting go of suspect foods?
What thoughts are you thinking that you would like to release?
What self-chosen stressors can you identify, and play with releasing?

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The Mean Voice is ALWAYS Wrong

The mean voice is always wrong. I don’t care what’s being said. If it is said with mean intent, or in a way meant to diminish us or hold us back, it is inaccurate. 

When others speak to me with a mean voice, it doesn’t matter what they are saying. It’s inaccurate because whatever they’re saying at me, is truly intended for them to hear. It has nothing to do with me and has only to do with how in alignment, or out of alignment, they are in that moment.

More importantly, when I speak to myself in a mean way, the message is always wrong. The mean girl voice in my head (aka gremlin voice, monster voice) is wrong every time she speaks.

How do I know she’s wrong?

That nasty feeling churning in my gut tells me she’s wrong. The crappy way it makes me feel every time she says something mean to me is a clear indication that she’s wrong. It’s a clear indication that I am thinking in a way that is as vibrationally far from my true vibration (Source) as I can get. That’s why it feels crappy.

When we hear something and it resonates within us, we feel the truth of that vibration and know it’s true by the way it feels in us – resonant.

When we hear something and it feels discordant within us, we feel the wrongness in that vibration and know it is wrong by the way it feels in us – harsh and jarring because it lacks harmony with our Source vibration.

Now, if you – like so many people – have a critical voice in your head constantly scolding that you are too this, then not enough that, and certainly should always be this way, and absolutely never ever be THAT way, or telling you that everything you do is wrong, and will never be enough, then PLEASE take a deep breath!

Not one of those messages is true, no matter how convinced you may be in the moment that the statement is valid or accurate. The message is coming from a mindset that is out of alignment with our Source energy, our True vibration. So take another deep breath and remind yourself of that Truth.

The mean girl voice is trying to protect us from something. At some point in our past something happened that we did not enjoy, and do NOT wish to repeat. Mean girl (or the Gremlin) arose to protect us from that happening again. The mean voice is a part of ourselves trying to protect us from reliving some past hurt.

Unfortunately the way that she often tries to protect us is by having us play small. If we stop living life and stop taking chances, or reaching for something we really want, there will be FAR fewer opportunities for us to get hurt. And while that may have been an excellent strategy for a seven-year-old avoiding parental disappointment or wrath, it is energy-draining and self-defeating as a strategy in the adult world.

So we can love that scared part of ourselves, and give her a big ole hug for everything she’s been doing to try to help us. Then in my mind, I like to lead her to a lounge chair at the beach, hand her a margarita, and tell her to relax and take some time off!

Every time she gets off her beach chair and slings criticism at me, I recognize it by the discordant feeling within. That’s my cue to take a deep cleansing breath, and remind her (and me) that’s old, outdated thinking, and we’re not thinking that way anymore!

Then I go one step further to help heal this negative messaging that has been programmed into me.

Whatever the criticism was, whatever the mean comment, I KNOW that it’s wrong, so I turn it around.

If she tells me I did something wrong, I look for what I did well.

If she says I am ugly or unworthy, I write myself a love letter and tell me all the ways I am beautiful and worthy.

If she tells me I’m fat, I remind her that body shaming is unacceptable. 

Fabulous, amazing, beautiful women come in every size and shape of body, and every one of those bodies is beautiful and worthy. Our culture has a broken vision of what beauty is, and critical views of what we “should” look like in order to be considered beautiful. Well fuck that. I will not allow the opinions of others to heap shame, or heavy negative judgement on myself or anyone else!

We have become so indoctrinated to this weight hate that women sometimes put off living our lives. We’re finally going to have it all figured out and live our dreams when we reach that magic number on a scale. (Scales are treacherous, lying machines that will give you completely different numbers at different times of day, or in different rooms of the house. If you have a scale lurking somewhere in your home, I highly recommend destroying it at once.)

As long as we are focused on what we weigh, we will never be focused on what is truly important. (Hint: NOT a number on a lying scale.) Maybe that’s the reason the patriarchy decided to brainwash us into focusing on what we weigh in the first place?  

Please remember when you hear the mean voice that she is wrong.

You can choose to start reprogramming your thoughts to ones that make you feel amazing, beautiful, happy, and fulfilled every day of your life!

Grow on!

What message is the critic in your head repeating?
How true is that?
What would you rather believe?
If you heard someone give that same criticism to a young person you love, what would you tell the young person? What would you say to the mean girl voice?

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Why I Coach

Suffering with unwanted symptoms, and struggling with compulsive eating SUCKS.

I know this first hand, because I’ve been through it.

I understand what it is to struggle with food, and to loathe myself for what I thought was lack of willpower. When I stopped over drinking, I ran right to sugar and picked up my addictive behaviors all over again. I felt like my appetite was out of control!

I tried fasting, starving, vegetarian, vegan, South Beach, Atkins, high fat, fat-free, high-carb, no carb, anything to try and control my appetite, and lose weight. In between diets I would binge eat sugary sweets, and live on carbs and cheese. 

I felt powerful any time I was controlling my weight, and beat the hell out of myself when I ate off plan, or any time I ate too much, which was frequently. My journal was saturated with self-loathing.

Unwanted symptoms baffled my doctors, left me exhausted and in pain. I was tired all the time and couldn’t figure out where my energy went! What I didn’t understand at the time was that inflammation was wreaking havoc with my body.  

The inflammation was caused by overeating sugary sweets, and other foods that my body did not process well, but in all the times I was seen for my mysterious symptoms, not one medical doctor ever even asked me what I was eating.

I knew I wasn’t eating healthy foods, but the fact that not one doctor looked at my food intake lead me to believe that food was NOT connected to my symptoms!

I felt like I was spinning out of control, like I was powerless over food, and would never figure it out! 

Then I found a naturopath who taught me to identify and release foods, that were depleting my energy. I also hired a coach who helped me identify and release behaviors that were depleting my energy, and guess what?!

I got RELIEF!

  • I felt better immediately.
  • My intestinal symptoms disappeared. 
  • The eczema that plagued me went away.
  • The horrible night sweats vanished. 
  • My energy increased tremendously. 
  • I started sleeping better.
  • I dropped 50 lb in 5 months without ever going to a gym, or doing a single workout! 

THAT’s when I decided that I want to help other women who are struggling with food, and unwanted symptoms the way I have!

I became a professionally Certified Core Energy Coach, and Women’s Empowerment Coach at the Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching.

Then I went on to study Mind Body Nutrition, and Dynamic Eating Psychology Coaching at the Institute for the Psychology of Eating. NOW it is my pleasure, my passion, and my purpose to help other women who are struggling create RELIEF in their lives!

Knowing how awful it feels to struggle with food, and knowing how much shame is attached to constantly seeing myself as a failure with food and health is the reason I coach. I don’t ever want any woman to have to feel that shitty, if it’s possible for me to help her move from exhausted to energized!

Let me know if I can be of service!

Wishing you energized thriving!

Relief through Release Playgroup

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Nope, nope, nope!

Millions of thoughts pop into our heads every day. Some of them are constructive, and some, not so much. Some of them feel wonderful, and some create fear. Some inspire confidence, others manifest self-doubt. 

The trick is to remember that if they pop in uninvited,
you only need to entertain the ones you enjoy!

I talk to my clients all the time about “milking the moment” when they have a thought that feels wonderful. We want to hang onto those as long as we can, and really milk them for every drop of pleasure that we can get. 

Why? Because energy attracts like energy.

The more we focus on what we enjoy, the more the Universe brings us to enjoy!

So what about those thoughts that pop in unannounced that are destructive, fear filled, and confidence crushing? My advice is to get rid of them the instant we become aware of them.

It’s perfectly understandable, when experiencing a financial or medical uncertainty, that scary thoughts and worst case scenarios might pop into out head. But these thoughts are here without invitation, so we don’t throw them a big party and invite them to stay!

As soon as I notice that my mind has wandered into a scary neighborhood, I quickly repeat “nope, nope, nope!” It’s like a little energy canceling mantra I use to retrieve my energy from unwanted territory. The quicker I can catch myself, and redirect with “nope, nope, nope” the better! 

Why? Because energy attracts like energy.

The more we focus on what is unwanted, the more the Universe brings us what is unwanted!

Of course we occasionally must focus on something we’d rather not, like preparing our taxes. But I’m talking about creating stories in our head of unreal events that may never happen. It’s a HUGE, and completely unnecessary, waste of our energy. The faster we vacate that territory, the calmer, happier, and more energized we will feel!

Nope, nope, nope!

Then we can intentionally shift attention onto something we DO want to attract. We can entertain best case scenarios and visualize those. Or if the energy is currently too charged around that topic, shift subjects entirely and focus on something that is sure to lift your energy and inspire you. Your grandkids, your pet, crafts or hobbies, podcasts meant to inspire. Whatever it is for you.

After the nope, nope, nope disrupts the negative energy, focus on anything that allows you to feel uplifted, happy, empowered, or inspired.

Grow on!

What thoughts are you currently entertaining that could use a good “Nope, nope, nope!”?

Create a list of as many people, places, and practices you can think of that never fail to comfort you, or make you feel amazing.

For an incomplete list of resources that inspire the crap outta me & my clients so we can energize our lives & thrive, check out my fabulous fucking toy box at THIS LINK!

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Your Inner Critic Needs Love

Stop beating yourself up!

Stop beating yourself up for using food as a coping mechanism. Sometimes humans need to cope, and food has been proven repeatedly to be a brilliant coping mechanism. We feel bad, we eat food, we feel better. Every time. We are brilliant to have figured this out. Why berate yourself for doing what works?

If we find we are relying on food to cope too frequently, then it can be a problem in other ways, but still no need to be harsh with ourselves. It’s simply an opportunity to explore other ways of coping, or to release some of the stressors that make us feel as though we need to cope.

Stop beating yourself up for not eating a “perfect” diet. There is no one PERFECT diet, and anyone who tells you otherwise is selling something. Finding what’s perfect for your health and your body takes experimentation. Let’s not trash ourselves for experimenting to see what works and what does not.

Stop beating yourself up for not having a media-approved “perfect” body. Who the fuck gave media the right to approve what is perfect and what is not? Beauty is subjective, and attraction is chemistry, often having nothing to do with our looks or our size!

Stopping negative self talk is a CHALLENGING shift because we’ve been beating ourselves up for so many perceived imperfections for so long!

Acceptance of where we are is the first step in transforming our relationship with food and body. We often choose to beat ourselves up because we are not already where we wish to be, but that’s so silly. We are learning. We are on a learning journey. We want to be kind and loving toward ourselves, just like we would be with a toddler as he’s learning to walk. As he’s finding balance, we would never scold him for stumbling, so why do we do it to ourselves?

Diet culture has taught us how NOT to eat, and how to suppress our hunger cues. It’s no wonder we get confused about what to eat, when to eat, and how much to eat. We are learning how to be eaters. Constantly beating ourselves up for getting it wrong only delays the process, and slows our progress.

So how do we make that mindset shift from harsh inner critic, to loyal, loving, unwavering supporter?

It takes practice, and it takes time, and awareness is key.

We cannot change anything until we become aware of it, so the trick is to catch it when it’s happening. We need to become aware that we are being harsh, in the moment we are criticizing ourselves.

Sometimes the self-criticism is very subtle. It may be an old recording that plays so constantly in the background that it has become white noise, barely audible. But once we start looking for it, we do grow our awareness, and we begin to be aware in the moment. THAT is the magic moment when we can start to shift! 

ABC Process

Awareness
Practice becoming aware when it’s happening. For many people, it’s simply a sudden feeling of being judged or disapproved of. For others, it’s hearing full sentences of disapproval and harsh judgement. It can be different for each of us, so we need to pay attention to try and catch it in the moment we are doing it.

Once we are aware in the moment that it’s happening, we can take action.

As soon as you are aware of the critic voice:

Breathe
Take a nice deep grounding breath.

Choose 
Choose love.

Choose a voice who speaks gently to you. Choose a voice you might use with someone you love, and care about, and would never criticize. Instead of criticizing yourself, choose to love yourself for being human.

It’s as simple as ABC, though it takes some practice to become aware and remember to do it in the moment. And if you don’t catch it in the moment, don’t beat yourself up. 

When you do catch it with your improving Awareness – Breathe, and Choose love.

Grow on!

Practice cultivating awareness of when the critic is speaking.
Then take a deep grounding breath, and choose love.
Every chance you get.

Need help letting go of that harsh inner critic?

I’m leading a 21 day support group where we learn to let go of beating ourselves up! Click HERE for full details!

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Misbehaved Kittens Russian Roulette of Self-Care

YAY for triggers!

What are triggers? Triggers are a golden fucking opportunities to expand our awareness, and grow through challenge. Triggers are gifts from the Universe, pointing to that which needs our attention.

Triggers are personal to each of us, and they generally piss us off, or generate some other strong, emotional response. They’re the things that get under our skin, which DEMAND a reaction from us. Often we can’t NOT react. And frequently, looking back, we wish we had acted in some other way instead of the way we reacted.

Generally triggers are accompanied by a feeling of stress. Whether we react, or hold back the reaction we feel, stress or anxiety are activated inside us. Sometimes we also beat ourselves up for having reacted. (Why did I let them get to me? I should be past this by now! What’s wrong with me? Or similar thoughts.) This can add shame to the toxic mixture of emotions already triggered within us, and increases our perceived stress.

Humans get triggered by all sorts of things. Think repeated behaviors that annoy, like a partner dropping dirty clothes on the floor, leaving dishes in the sink, or not calling when they will be late. These behaviors don’t trigger me – and maybe not you either – but they are triggers for many people. Triggers come in all shapes and sizes. Coworkers, children, politicians, parents, or pets can all trigger us for different reasons.

Recently I was speaking with a client who has two new kittens that she adores. They are young, and energetic, and often misbehave and steal small, important objects and hide them out of reach. As we were talking, a new game popped into my head. 

What if every time the misbehaved kittens trigger frustration, we create an opportunity for self-love instead?

Misbehaved Kittens Russian Roulette of Self-Care

I suggested she make a list of everything she considers self-care, write each item on a slip of paper, and place the slips of paper into a hat, a fishbowl, or a fancy box. Then every time the kittens misbehave, she reaches into the fishbowl and pulls out a self-care prize, instead of shooting herself in the foot with stress, reactivity, blame, and shame. 

She loved the idea, and so do I!
I encourage everyone to play.

The game allows us to be triggered into self care, and replace stress-building reactions with desirable actions that reduce stress and build healthy habits! Of course you don’t need misbehaved kittens to play. You could play Annoying Coworker Russian Roulette of Self-Care, or Inattentive Spouse Russian Roulette of Self-Care, or my current personal favorite, Puppy Poops on the Carpet Russian Roulette of Self-Care.

So how do you define self-care?

Anything qualifies that makes YOU feel cared for, held, and supported. The header contains lots of great possibilities for self-care, and below is a short list. I encourage you to personalize your list to include your favorites, and only use those that truly resonate for you. Some women love to get pedicures and look forward to them as a pampering treatment. Others find them tedious, and don’t enjoy having their feet touched. There is no right or wrong. It’s about whatever makes you feel calm, relaxed, cared for, and loved. 

Self-Care possibilities:

Make a gratitude list.
Dance for 5 to 10 minutes.
Schedule a massage.
Journal.
Get a mani-pedi.
Journal while you get a mani-pedi.
Fix a cup of your favorite tea.
Take a nap.
Sing your favorite song, and really belt it out.
Do some mirror work.
Take 10 slow deep breaths.
Take a 10 minute yoga break.
Sit in the jacuzzi.
Take a walk.
Spend time in the sun.
Write yourself a love note.
Go to bed early.
Call an uplifting friend.
Look at beautiful photos of nature.
Create art.

Grow on!

Make your own list of self-care.
Write each item on a slip of paper.
Place them in a container that pleases you.
Now when you feel triggered, you can choose to react by reaching for self-care.

Header image photo credit – Thanks to Western Oregon University!