Feed. Your. Soul.

The last six months have been challenging for all of us.  

COVID 19 Quarantine
Trapped indoors by smoky skies and raging fires
Travel restrictions
Canceled vacations
Weddings postponed or socially distanced
Reduced financial resources
People we know sick, or dying
Increasing tech stress
‘Homeschooling’ our kids
The utter LACK of hugs in this world!

Not to mention any personal challenges your may be facing like sick pets, vehicle breakdowns, relationships ending, or health issues – other than pandemic viruses – that force you to expose yourself to situations that could allow you to come in contact with the virus.

Normally, I am a beacon of buoyant energy.  One of my superpowers is seeing the opportunities in the challenges, knowing there IS purpose to the apparent madness, and keeping my balance despite what’s going on in the world or my life.  

However recently I have been feeling the heaviness of it all.  “Golden Fucking Opportunities” (GFOs) for growth have been raining down around me.  I have a travel addiction.  Travel opportunities feed my soul.  So far this year we have canceled nights in Monterey, Yosemite, and Burney Falls, and weeks in Colorado and Arches National Park.  It helped me to know that I am NOT the only one who had to cancel travel plans.  I am not alone in this.  We are all canceling plans, and adjusting to our own set of GFOs.  But then I found out that we have to postpone our trip to Hawaii (booked since February) and don’t have any way to know when we will get to go.  It hit me like a ton of bricks.  

Suddenly it was ALL just too fucking much.  Hawaii had been my carrot through all the other challenges, so when they took that from me too, I hit the wall.

Royal Kona Sunset

In the past

In the past when I hit a wall emotionally, my world would go black and I would crawl under my blankets for days or weeks.  I would beat myself up telling myself I didn’t deserve fun, travel, happiness, or even love.  I would open the dark umbrella thought of “who cares?!” which lead me repeatedly to eat damaging foods, stop working out, and to thinking even more emotionally draining thoughts!  In the past I would lie there wondering WHY I felt so shitty, and why the world hated me and was being so mean to me.

And who could blame me?  Given that set of circumstances, anyone could want to react that way.

waterfalls at Plitvicka Jezera National Park

But now I know better.

Therapy and coaching have helped me discover how energy draining that old behavior is, how depleting, stress-inducing and disease causing.  

So last week when I hit the wall, I asked myself, “Cyndi, what do you need to feel better right NOW?”

1- Knowing what I need has made a huge difference in my life.
2- Allowing myself to do what I need is THEE difference in my life.

Ever since I learned that what I was doing was NOT working for me,
I have been on a quest to become aware of what DOES work for me.

Some of the things I have learned are:
Having something to look forward to is CRUCIAL to my state of mind.  
Talking to my coach ALWAYS lifts my energy exponentially.  
Getting a massage ALWAYS releases stress.

Rather than spiral into darkness like I would have in the past:
1 – I texted my fabulous coach, Jill Lebeau, and moved up my session.
2 – I scheduled a massage for my day off.
3 – I decided that I would schedule some travel or go stark raving mad.

Korcula Island, Croatia ~ Google image

Despite travel restrictions and the great inability to determine what the fuck the pandemic or politics will bring next, I have been planning my next trip to Croatia for almost a year now.  I couldn’t know when it might happen, I was just having fun dreaming of all the places we will visit when it DOES happen.  I’ve been watching ticket prices for months and they have been pretty steadily priced around $1,300.  That’s less than the last time we flew to Europe, but I was convinced I could get a better price than that!

Monday morning I decided that I didn’t care WHAT bargain rate I might get later.  I knew without doubt that if I had airline tickets for my dream vacation in hand, I would feel buoyant again, and all my challenges would morph back into opportunities.  I decided that I would just PAY the $1,300 fare.  We have been saving for this trip, so we already had enough saved for the two tickets. 

It would be worth paying full price just to feel better!  

The instant I had that thought, my spirit lightened immensely!

Dubrovnik ~ 2017

I pulled up searches of all my favorite airlines, checked different cities to fly into, tried different hubs to fly through, looking for the best deal available and the most AMAZING thing happened.  I found a fare on a reputable airline, with reasonable travel times for less than $800 round trip for each of us. YES! I checked all the details a second time, then booked the tickets.

Then I had a dance party in my living room. 

I was SO right!  My energy popped back up like a cork I had been holding under water.  Suddenly my energy was vibrant and flowing.
At my coaching session, instead of my coach helping me out of a dark place where I had gotten stuck (as would have happened in the past),
I was telling her about the miraculous return of my energy, and increased capacity to support others through the MANY golden fucking opportunities that are happening all around us!  I knew without a doubt what my soul needed to shine, and I didn’t hesitate to give it to myself.  Some might think it selfish, but that bit of self-care was crucial to my emotional wellbeing, and paid off tenfold!

Go me!

Dubrovnik, Croatia

My coach wisely pointed out that deciding to spend the full price because I deserved to feel better embodied an abundance mindset, and that vibration of abundance allowed me to attract the super low fare on a high-quality airline.  

Fuck. Yes.

And now, I feel INCREDIBLE, nearly invincible!  I am manifesting what I truly desire by trusting my KNOWING about what I need, and allowing that to outweigh the financial consideration.  I feel far more able to focus on my life and my clients.

Did all my challenges/opportunities just go away?  Hell no! 

But the things that frustrated the crap outta me a couple days ago seem like nothing more than minor irritants now.  They seem far more like opportunities than challenges.

And burdens that had felt unbearable – the unexpected death of a beloved pet, a best friend facing months of chemotherapy – became at least manageable, and I am able to remember that, in time, even these burdens will reveal gifts for us.

Am I saying that if you are struggling with GFOs you should plan a trip to Croatia?  Maybe.  If that’s what turns YOU on.  Heavens no, if you don’t enjoy travel.

What I am saying is that when the world seems to be crumbling around us it’s extremely beneficial to know what it is YOU need. 

Then allow yourself that.  ALL of that.

a room i dream of renting in Dubrovnik…

Grow on!

What works for you?
What person, place, thing lifts your spirits no matter what?
How can you allow yourself more of that?
What’s holding you back from allowing more of that in your life?
What will change for you when you allow yourself more of what feeds your soul?

Cyndi in Dubrovnik ~ 2017

What do you expect?

Recently one of my clients expressed an apprehension to look forward to anything with eager anticipation, or visualize her ideal outcome for fear the actual outcome will fall short of her desire and disappoint her.  She is certainly not alone! I mean, why get your hopes up just to have them dashed? 

Actually, many of my clients, family and friends have expressed these same kind of thoughts.  They are afraid to imagine the outcome they desire for fear it will not manifest, and then they will feel a sense of loss or disappointment.  Yet, some of them also seem perfectly happy to imagine the WORST that might happen.  They invest time and energy worrying what might happen, what could go wrong, what others might think.  The stark image of whatever they are imagining failure looks like is vivid as a movie screen in their minds.

This kind of imagining allows us to feel the exact emotions we are afraid we might feel if we envision success and don’t achieve it!  We actually practice feeling the emotions we want to avoid like guilt, anxiety, grief or disappointment in advance.  Instead of avoiding them, we create them, perpetuate them, and cling to them.

It’s the story we’re telling in our head causing the emotions, right? 

Because the thing we are fearing or dreading is still in the future!  Hasn’t even happened yet, but we are willing to mold this incredible energy-draining story around it that ends in disappointment and failure.

How much does this resonate for you?  Sound familiar at all?  If it does, you are not alone!

What would shift for you if instead of following the storyline to the worst possible conclusion, you allowed yourself to follow the storyline to the most beautiful outcome you can imagine? 

Stick with me for a minute, because I can still feel your energy protesting that if you imagine that beautiful image, and don’t get your imagined outcome, your heart will break and you will be forced to endure heartache and disappointment.

Did you see that catch 22?   By avoiding imagining positive outcomes in order to avoid disappointment, we instantly create disappointment.  Crazy, right?

The key then is to  follow the storyline you are creating in your head to the BEST outcome you can imagine, then don’t attach yourself to the outcome. 

Allow yourself to dream the biggest dream you have – and feel the satisfaction, joy, and fulfillment of standing in the moment of achieving it –  and then remember that yours is only one scenario in a million possibilities.  The Universe may have something even BETTER in mind for us than anything we can dream.

Often we identify what we want, but instead of continuing to focus on WHAT we want, we try to figure out HOW to get it, and that’s where we get sideways.

Imagining the moment of achieving your dream and allowing yourself to feel the satisfaction of it, tells the Universe you are ‘open to THIS please’ and things that feel like THIS.  Then your energetic frequency is vibrating in harmony with what you want, and the Law of Attraction brings you things that match your vibration.

The trick is to imagine the best possible outcome we can, and then:

1) realize that it’s NOT the (lover, home, job, whatever) that we desire.  It’s the way the (lover, home, job, whatever) makes us FEEL that we truly desire.

2) remember that the Universe can imagine INFINITELY more ways to make us feel that way than we can.  Certainly more than the one scenario we created in our mind.

This FREES us from attachment to any outcome.

And it’s certainly more FUN than just not thinking about what you would LOVE to create (today, next week, next year, in 5 years, ten…) because you don’t know HOW it’s going to happen for you.  Just imagine you WILL get to feel the way you truly want to feel.  And if you are envisioning it and vibrating what it feels like to receive it, you are already feeling what you truly want to feel! 

Envisioning the outcome we desire is a great way to speed up manifesting that desire – like a supercharge.  If we don’t allow ourselves the pleasure of envisioning that manifestation, we slow the rate at which our desire can manifest.  But once you put the energy out there, be open to however the Universe chooses to deliver your desire!

Sit back, chill out, and allow the Universe to surprise and delight you!

Grow on!

What do you most want to manifest?
How will you feel when you manifest your desire?
How do you feel when you think about achieving that desire?
How possible is it to let go of the outcome and trust that the Universe is delivering that or something better?
Which feels better to you; reciting the mantra, “I will win the lotto this weekend!” or one of the two affirmations below? Why?

Embracing positive expectations, and letting go of attachment to outcomes is something I help my clients do every day. 

If you need some help sorting out the specifics of your expectations and attachments, schedule a free 20 minute chat with me and walk away with at least one actionable step to help you move toward whatever you truly desire!

Don’t Wait for Happy

Are you moving toward a goal that you KNOW will make you happy when you reach it? That’s AWESOME!  Are you feeling happy about it NOW as you move toward it?

Some people will answer yes, and some will answer no. For the yes’s, they are almost guaranteed a happy outcome when they reach their goal, because they are happy before they reach their goal.

For the no’s, even if they are a hundred percent sure that goal is going to make them happy, their chances are much lower than their counterparts for actually reaching happiness.  Why?  Because the path to happiness is never miserable.  An unhappy journey cannot lead to happily-ever-after.  

Happiness is worth NOT waiting for!

We CAN, and do, get to happily-ever-after through challenges, hardships, and opportunities for growth, but those are not the same as unhappy.

It is never the challenge or the hardship that makes us unhappy, it’s our perspective.  There are people in the most challenging circumstances, or who come through the most traumatic situations, who are able to have cheerful dispositions and positive states of mind.  If we want to feel happy when we reach our goal, then we gotta find ways to feel happy on our journey toward that goal.

The best way to do that is to feel happy (or at least not miserable) about the steps you are taking in the creation of that goal. Another way to do that is to just look around for things that already make you happy.

Instead of just driving to work in the morning, look for flowers that are your favorite color, or trees backlit by the sun, or smiling faces walking by.  Whatever it is that already brings you joy or happiness, look for that. Let it be your intention to see the things that lift your spirit. Find ways to incorporate fun and laughter into your life. 

Allow small, simple pleasures to bring you happiness as often as possible!  Seriously – take your joy where you find it!

Bitmojis!

No grown woman should love Bitmojis as much as I do.  But I do!  I love the darn things!  Don’t know what a Bitmoji is?

Bitmoji has created a FUN way to express yourself in text messages, and I send them ALL THE TIME!  Every time I text my potato self to someone, I smile.

If you use text messages and you don’t have Bitmoji, I highly recommend it for the smiles of fun it adds to texting!

Find small things that make big smiles. 

Allow the Universe to surprise and delight you daily.  Being happy along the journey is the best way to assure a happy-ever-after destination!

Grow on!

What small pleasures do you allow to delight you?
Share them in the comments!  I would love to know.


A word on practicing happiness ~

I absolutely advocate practicing happiness daily!

But I do NOT mean that we’re not supposed to experience other emotions! ALL of our feelings are for feeling! Anger, sadness, grief, joy, ecstasy, frustration, hope, the full range of human emotions is our guidance system. We want to allow them, process them & move through them. If you need help with that, coaching can help. Schedule a little chat with me by clicking this link.

Covid Blue

I’ve been experiencing a little depression in my energy lately. 
Why?  Cause I’m fucking human!

Like most of the rest of the world, we had to cancel vacation plans this year. I was supposed to be writing to you today from a hotel room. We planned a road trip with our wiener dog, Boscoe, to visit family in Colorado, then a couple of National Parks in Utah on the way home. 

Google Images: Arches National Park

I hadn’t realized how much I was looking forward to it!  I kind of used it like a carrot to get through the first part of quarantine.  I told myself, “Come September, I’ll be on the road with my camera at National Parks, visiting family and friends enjoying the scenery and sunshine!”

It never dawned on my positive thinking that come September we wouldn’t have controlled the spread of the pandemic yet, like every other country in the world has done.  It’s almost time for the “second wave” and the United States hasn’t ridden out the first wave!

For over a week after canceling our plans, I found myself unable or unwilling to focus on coaching classes, workshop preparations, marketing promotions, house work, or anything. 

I let it all go and just kinda vegged, simply letting the lethargy unfold.  I filled my days surfing Booking.com, dreaming of a trip to Croatia sometime post-pandemic.  I searched flights for a full seven days before feeling satisfied that I knew where to get the best deal and which days to fly.  Then I turned my attention to accommodations and sightseeing.  You should SEE the amazing places you can rent in Croatia!

Booking.com image

I had a blast planning that trip.  NO idea when we’ll get to go, but I do know where we are going!  

So why didn’t I just coach myself back into a better feeling place?

Because I needed to feel that disappointment for a minute.  I wasn’t READY yet to get back to feeling good.  I wanted to feel better, but without pretending that my disappointment wasn’t real, or didn’t happen.  Of course it happened!  Challenges come up in life.  It’s an integral part of the human experience.

I didn’t feel the need to rail against it, or beat myself up for not feeling my best.  I just needed some time to process. Some people might call that indulgent. I call it taking mental health days.

Practicing happiness daily does NOT mean that I suddenly have a magical life without challenges, full of rainbows and unicorns.  It means that when life gets me down, I know it’s part of the process, and I know that I have the tools to get myself back on track.  

At a pace of my own choosing.

Grow on!

What emotions are you feeling right now?
Which ones do you need time to process?
When are you giving yourself the space to do that?

What Do You Truly Desire?

The first time I read a book by Esther Hicks was in February of 2010. The book was Ask and it is Given, and it resonated with me completely.  I immediately began trying to increase my vibration, create an even more positive attitude, and manifest my riches.   And when I say riches, I specifically mean a water view home.

My deepest desire is to have a home that looks out over the water.   Water calms me, energizes me, and uplifts my spirit.  In those first fledgling years learning about the law of attraction, I poured immense energy into telling the universe that I want a water view home.  Even when my lottery numbers didn’t hit, I kept feeling excited about the next draw, always certain that my big win was just around the corner. One time in particular, I must have really had my hopes up because when my numbers didn’t hit, my positivity balloon burst.

I fell into a depression, and railed at the universe for not giving me my truest desire.  I couldn’t understand why my water view home eluded me!  It was around that time that I heard Esther say something to the effect of “ it’s not the manifestation you want, it’s the way the manifestation makes you feel.”   So I sat down to journal about how I was going to feel when I did manifest my water view home.

Happy, calm, uplifted, joyful, connected to Spirit.  

This was the manifestation I wanted.   These emotions were what I truly desired, and I thought that I could get them through living in a home with a water view. So I started looking for ways to manifest the emotions of happy, calm, uplifted, joyful, and connected to Spirit.

I live close enough to the Napa River to walk there in 15 minutes.  I live close enough to a small park that overlooks the Carquinez Bridge  to walk there in 10 minutes.  One of the things I started doing each day  was walking to one of these places, sometimes both. I began referring to the little park as “my patio” so I could say that this was the view from “my patio.”

My walks allow me to feel happy, calm, uplifted, joyful, connected to Spirit, vibrant, healthy, and active. Plus I get to see the water every day!  Bonus!

Something else I started doing was to manifest one or more waterview homes every time we go on vacation.  When we travel anywhere, I pay a little extra, and then for a week or more, I get to savor my coffee each morning looking out on the water I love.  I get to infuse myself with the essence of sunlight sparkling on water.  I relish the rich colors of sunrise and the deep beauty of sunsets.  I charge my batteries with the current produced by thrashing waves, or roaring waterfalls.  And I carry that energy with me each and every day and let it buoy my positivity.  

I still buy lottery tickets and I fully expect to win a fortune each time because it’s fun to think about all the fun I’ll have.  But in the mean time, I’m already manifesting what I truly desire!

Grow on!

What is it that you want more than anything?

What emotion will you feel when you have manifested it?

How can you create that emotion now?

Make a short list of people, places, or things that bring you that emotion already.

How can you bring more of those into your life daily?

Free To Feel Fully Human

Some emotions get a bad rap. You know the ones I mean.  Those that get branded negative, the ones that don’t feel good when we feel them in our bodies.  Emotions like anger, resentment, fear, or disgust, are ones that people don’t enjoy, and often try to avoid.  

I’m a mindset coach, and one of the things I help people do is explore different perspectives.  If we have deeply held beliefs that are not serving us, then it can be quite beneficial to shift the way that we’re thinking.  A common misperception that happens is that clients want to change how they feel, without first acknowledging the emotions they already feel.

It makes sense.  Of course we don’t want to feel hard emotions.  Who does?   But suppressing those emotions takes a lot of energy, and robs us of part of the rich tapestry of the human experience.  Imagine if an artist created her paintings with only the middle tones of colors, leaving the most vibrant colors on either end of the spectrum out of the picture. We wouldn’t get the full experience, would we?

Start Where You Are

We cannot change how we feel until we process the emotions we are already experiencing.  And it’s important to remember that ALL of our emotions are okay. They are what they are. People don’t control their emotions. Our emotions arise to show us what we’re thinking.  Our emotions arrive with the message to pay attention – become aware – of the thoughts we are choosing. (Spoiler alert: our thoughts CREATE our emotions!)

So if you feel angry, disappointed, or hurt.  Allow yourself to FEEL angry, disappointed or hurt.  Sit with the feeling.  Acknowledge it.  Instead of resisting challenging emotions, allow them to be what they are – sensations in our body.  Practice describing the physical sensations you feel when you feel the emotion. Then try “being with” the emotion by focusing on the physical sensations.

Example: fear to speak in public might feel to some people like sweaty palms, increased heart rate, tight shoulders. If that’s the case, focus on the palms, the heart, the shoulders, without attaching the story of public speaking. Observe the physical sensations objectively, and they begin to subside.

For a more active method of processing emotions, find a safe space, set a timer and give yourself 15 or 20 minutes to just be obsessed, or throw a fit or have a tantrum. Scream into your pillow, or beat it up. Vomit the voices in your head onto pages you can burn later.  Your inner child is asking to be heard and is not going to let you feel content again until you give yourself some space to process those emotions.  Cry if you need to. Let yourself rage until the timer goes off.

You’ll be surprised and delighted how quickly the intensity of the emotion  can dissipate.

If your emotions feel too big to handle on your own, like they might swallow you if you let yourself be alone with them, then find a wonderful therapist to create that safe space with you.

Avoiding or suppressing our emotions cannot destroy that catabolic energy.
It simply transfers that energy somewhere else.  It’s like holding a beach ball underwater, eventually it’s going to pop back up with a lot of force.  Many times when we try to suppress anger,
or resentment that energy gets even heavier and shows up as shame, depression,
or self-doubt.

If we try to suppress fear, and brush it off as nothing, we could learn that we’re in actual danger and our intuition was giving us a very important message.  I like to ask my anger or my disappointment what it’s trying to tell me.  If you are feeling angry about something, there is a reason for that anger, and only you know what that reason is.  What is your anger trying to tell you?  (Hint: it’s NOT that someone else needs to shape up.)

Processing our emotions is important.

This is not the same as directing our emotions at somebody else.   We can’t spill anger, frustration and irritation on others and expect them to process it for us. They are not responsible for our emotions any more than we are responsible for theirs!  If this has been your experience of hard emotions – people directing them at you, or others around you – it makes perfect sense that you would want to suppress them, or that you would see them as harmful or scary. Anyone would feel that way. Processing our emotions is an introspective thing, meaning it is a mirror to look into in order to learn more about our own mind, and improve our own experience of life.  

Trying to shift mindset without processing emotions first is like putting a happy-face sticker on a gas gauge so you can’t see that the tank is empty. It looks better on the surface but doesn’t address the underlying cause!

Once we have accepted that we have challenging emotions (as all humans do), then we can process them. Once we have processed our emotions, then we can begin to shift our mindset so that we attract better feeling emotions!

Grow on!

How comfortable are you feeling all of your emotions?

How comfortable are you expressing all of your emotions?

What emotions are you suppressing?

How might that be affecting your life?


This is a process I help my clients with all the time! If you are ready to transform your life, please contact me at this link to schedule a short conversation. I look forward to connecting with you.

What If We Assumed The Best?

We do the best we can until we know better, and then we do better.

This is as true for you as it is for me. The more we learn the better we do. What if we simply assumed that were true for every person that we meet? We hear a lot of complaining on social media about people not acting the way that we wish they would act, or the way we think we would act in their situation.  I see people being shamed all the time for not doing what someone else thinks they should be doing.

 But what if they don’t know what you know?  

What if they received the same information that you did, but they didn’t perceive it in the same way?  What if they could not comprehend its true meaning?   What if they have other influences in their lives giving them conflicting information?   What if their lives created certain filters through which they see the truth, which makes their truth different?  What if they’re confused about what is right and are simply afraid to admit they don’t know because they don’t want to be shamed for not knowing?

How certain are you that what you know is right in the context of their lives? Even if there’s something that 99% of us agree is right, how can we say that ANYTHING is right for EVERYONE? How important is it to you to be right?  How open are you willing to be to the viewpoints of others?

Instead of condemning others for viewpoints or actions that are not identical to our own, what if we simply assumed that they’re doing the best they can with the information they have to work with?  What if we simply assumed the best of everyone we meet?  

One way that we can do that, is to not label other people.  If we use the sentence, “Did you see what that jerk did?”, then the person that were talking to is going to look for the behavior of a jerk. What if we replace that sentence with, “Did you see what that human did?”   This leaves the person that you’re speaking to free to see what they see instead of foreshadowing what they’re looking for.

And if I’m willing to label somebody else a jerk, doesn’t that kind of make me a jerk?

What if we just give them the benefit of the doubt, and assume that they are doing the best they can with the information they have in this moment.  

We can even choose to give ourselves the benefit of the doubt!  Instead of beating ourselves up for something that we have done in the past, what if we just choose to believe that we were doing the best we could with what we knew then. If we stand in our present, now knowing better, and we realized that we would like to have done something different in the past, we can use that information to inform our choices moving forward without first wielding it on ourselves like a baseball bat.

What if we just assumed the best?

Grow on! 

How would it feel to give yourself the benefit of the doubt?    

How much less stress would we feel if we gave everyone the benefit of the doubt?      

What would the world be like if we each realized that every one of us is greater and wiser then we appear to be?

Own Your Awesome!

Human beings have a hard time owning our awesome.  We can see it, admire it, value it, but rarely do we ever want to attach it to ourselves.

I want you to own your awesome, so here’s a simple exercise I hope will help.

Make a list of your values.
Make a list of qualities you admire in others.

The lists will be different for each of us, but could look like this:
Nature
Connection
Vitality
Faith
Confidence
Joyful
Independent
Creative
Honest  
Professional  
Trustworthy 
Reliable  
Calm
Effective
Helpful

As I mentioned in my earlier post, Who Do You Admire Most?,
if you SEE these qualities, you ARE these qualities.

“I am” statements help us own qualities in a powerful way!

Often we use them against ourselves:
I am broke.
I am depressed.
I am so stupid.

You KNOW this song! Most of us sing it frequently.  Those kind of “I am” statements need to be released because “I am” attaches us and we don’t want to (or need to) own those qualities!

Look at that list of your values, and qualities you admire.  Which ones do you already embody?  “I am organized,” is one I can completely relate to.  Choose  the ones from your list that resonate most, and own them first.

I am honest.
I am professional.
I am trustworthy.

Then cull the list again for ones that you are growing toward, or desire to embody, and own them too!

I am confidence.
I am amazing.
I am joyful.
I am uplifting.

Own your awesome.  Affirm your awesome.  Practice the “I am” statements that feel GOOD to you!  

Practice. Practice. Practice.

Grow on!

What characteristics do you regularly affirm with “I am” statements?
Do you want to own them?
How willing are you to release those?
What qualities do you want to affirm as your own?
How often are you willing to practice owning them?

How to Increase Your Own Motivation

What’s your Why?

Why do you want to do the things that you want to do?  If you don’t know the answer to this question, chances are your motivation is pretty low.

Having a deep, powerful why is a monumental motivator!

Want to motivate others?  Help them connect to their why!
Want to motivate yourself?  Ask yourself WHY you want to do this thing for which you seek motivation.

I hear some of you say, “I don’t WANT to do it, I HAVE to do it.” 

That’s why you have no motivation!

If we feel forced to do something we don’t want to do, of course we don’t feel inspired to jump right in and do our best!  Have you ever noticed that getting out of bed to go to a job you’re not thrilled about can be a real challenge?  Conversely, how challenging is it to get up on the first day of vacation?  Easy, right?!  When we want to do it, we’re inspired to action!

So what will it take to shift “have to” into “want to”?

There are often things that feel like we “have to” (NEED to) do them – as if we have no choice.  But we DO have a choice.  Always.  Sometimes we have a choice about what actions we can take, and sometimes our choice lies in how we perceive what we are doing.  It’s the second set I want to discuss today.

Two Easily-Relatable Examples

Work Scenario –

I have to go to work because I have debt and DREAMS!  I NEED money, so I am forced to spend my time in this way that I do not want!

Health Scenario –

I have to lose weight.  I don’t like how my body looks.  I’m unhealthy.  My doctor says I have to give up foods that I love and work my body harder, and I just don’t want to!

All of the thoughts in each scenario point in the direction of unwanted.  They push against.  These are energy draining thoughts, and most of us FEEL our energy drain just reading them.  Who wants to LIVE them?  If this is how our thoughts feel around any subject, we will NOT be motivated by them.  We might find ways to buffer our feelings and just put up with the crappy job.  We can certainly create plans with action steps that could lead us to our health goals.  But if the whole thing feels like it’s being forced on us, then we are powerless to create sustainable change.

We want to be at choice.

Choice empowers us.  How can we choose to reframe the above thoughts so they are serving and motivating us instead of draining us?  There are as many possibilities as there are people.  It’s going to be different for each of us, but here are some possibilities to consider:

Work Scenario –

I have a steady source of income.  I am moving toward my goals.  I’m paying off debt.  I’m saving for my future, getting closer to my dreams.  This position is a blessing, and a stepping stone on my path to the next position that suits me better and checks off more of my boxes.  I am content that I have this place to stand where I can see my dreams moving toward me, and I can choose to be delighted that I feel my dreams moving closer.  I choose to spend some of my time earning money, and make the MOST of the rest of my hours by finding things that lift my vibration and allow me to enjoy each day of my life!  This is not where I end up, this is the middle of my story, and so much MORE is flowing to me now!

Health Scenario –

I want to feel healthy & energized.  I want to feel confident in my skin.  I want to trust myself & the choices I make.  I can make small adjustments that bring steady improvement.  I want steady improvements.  I want to move in the direction my goals.  I want to learn what foods truly serve my greater health.  It’s not the same for everyone, and I am curious what I will find to be true for me.  Trying new foods is exciting.  I wonder which activities feel good once I give them a chance?  What wonderful new foods and activities will I discover that I love?  I want to feel excited about healthy choices.  I am excited about growing confident.

Which ones resonate for you? Which motivate you? What are some energy supporting thoughts that came up for you as you read these? 

Changing our thoughts takes practice, because the thoughts we’ve been practicing are already in there and attracting more thoughts like the ones we’ve been practicing!

The first step to changing our thoughts into ones that motivate us is awareness!

Grow on!

What came up for you as you read the thought examples above?

What thoughts are you currently thinking that already motivate you toward your goals?

Which thoughts are holding you back?

How can you reframe those to support you in moving toward your goal?

What’s your Why?

Who the Fuck are You?

As I lay sleeping one morning, I dreamed that someone wrote this comment on my blog:  Who the fuck are you?  You think you have all the answers?  (It went on, but as dreams will do, the edges went blurry.)

I woke with a start. Our subconscious mind speaks to us in dreams, and it was pretty clear that mine had questions.  I went to my journal and wrote, “who the fuck are you?”  After my morning coffee and meditations, I sat to consider the query, and answer my inner critic.

First of all, I don’t have all the answers!

I don’t have ANY fucking answers except for those that are right for me.  I don’t write my blog, or coach my clients because I know what anyone else should do, cause I don’t have a fucking clue what’s right for anyone else.  Answers are something each of us will find inside.  

What I do have is a growing list of options that help me, and countless others, find some of the answers we are seeking.  I say ‘we’ because I am walking this path with you, with my clients.  We are all in this together and the more one of us grows, the more we all grow! 

How do I know?  My clients inspire me daily!

I have as many questions as answers, because I am human.  Our common humanity means that what works for some of us might also work for you.  But that’s something you will need to explore and discover for yourself.

The things I share in my blog include topics that frequently come up while coaching my clients, challenges I am growing through myself, and some of the tools and resources available that have a track record of helping people uncover answers within themselves.

Here are some of the things I have discovered on my journey so far:
Human beings are energy systems. 
Energy attracts like energy. 
The energy we radiate is the energy the world reflects back to us. 
We are all seeking connection.   
We thrive when we are connected to Source and to each other. 
There are many practices that help connect us to Source. 
All experiences are opportunities for growth. 
Each person we meet is our teacher and our student. 
Words have power, so wield them with all the wisdom at your disposal. 
Everyone’s journey is as unique and as valuable as every other journey.  
Life offers neither problems nor challenges, only opportunities. 
Helping people discover Truth empowers them. 
Helping people remember their power empowers me. 
My purpose in life is to uplift the human spirit. 
Treat YOURSELF as you wish to be treated!
Radical self-acceptance is key! 
Powerful people empower others.

How much of this resonates for you?

These are not answers.  They are simply truths I have found helpful in guiding me to my own answers.  If you want to read more along these lines, you can subscribe to my blog here.

So, who the fuck am I?

Well, I’m a huge fan of Esther Hicks and her work with Abraham. I have spent a decade trying to figure out how to incorporate their teachings into my life.  I used to be terrified.  I thought life was happening to me, and desperately wanted to be the creator of my own experience, the way Esther-Abraham told me I could be.

I’ve survived alcoholism, and food addiction.  With the help of some really wonderful therapists, I lifted myself from depression.  I am addicted to joy, and seek pleasure everywhere.  I’m human and have made a LOT of poor choices, but I managed to learn from them, which means they were not mistakes but lessons.  I’ve grown.  I’ve hurt people.  I’ve acted against my own best interest sometimes.  I have absolutely argued for my own limitations.

I feel like I am happy and helpful most of the time.

I’m an entrepreneur, and the mother of two wonderful humans.  I’m an award-winning massage therapist.  I’m a landscape photographer.  I’m a poet, and a dancer, and a recovering perfectionist.  I’m an empowerment coach passionate about helping women remember who they are, and tap into their true power.

“Helping women remember who they are…”

At this point in my writing, I stopped cold and LAUGHED out loud.  That mouth-open, head-back kind of laugh that boils up from my belly and embarrasses my ex-husband.

My subconscious was simply asking me what I ask my clients ALL the time.  “Who ARE you?”

And I answered in much the same way that my clients always do. 
I began with a list of ‘how’ I am and ‘what’ I am. NONE of this is my ‘who.’ Underneath all of WHAT we each are, and HOW we each are, we are all the same Divine Who.

Truth Bomb

I am Source energy.  I am infinite intelligence embodied.  I am wisdom.  I am faith.  I am confidence.  I am vitality.  I am connection.  I am Nature.  I am Goddess/God made flesh.  I am Divine.  I am.

And so are You!

We are all One.  We are all Source.  All of us are One energy at our core.

What does this mean?

Well, for one thing it means that when we are carrying heavy, negative emotions, we can release those.  They don’t belong to our natural vibration.  That is not ‘who’ we are, so we do not have to hang onto those feelings.  Self-doubt, anxiety, worry and fear can be released.  The reason they feel heavy, is because they do NOT resonate (match) with our core energy – the energy of Source (God/Goddess).  The reason these heavy emotions exist is to be our rumble strip on the road of life.

When we own our truth we KNOW without doubt that we are Source, we are wisdom, we are love.  And we feel GOOD.  It resonates, it vibrates in harmony with the vibration at our core.  Heavy feeling emotions do not vibrate in harmony with our core energy.  They create discord within us.  When we feel that discord, it’s simply a gentle reminder that we are moving away from the direction we want to be moving – just like the rumble strip on the highway when we stray too far from the center line.

Humans want to feel GOOD.  We want to stick to the center line of love, light, infinite wisdom, and the TRUTH of Who we are.  When we focus on the truth of Who we are, the Universe brings us MORE into alignment with faith, confidence, vitality and all the other aspects of our true nature.

Who the fuck am I?  I am you.  You are me. 
We are God/Goddess energy here to expand our awareness and grow. 
We are Divine energy in human form.  

Positively Divine!  That’s who I am.  That’s who you are, too.

Grow on!

Who are you? 
How much of the Source energy at your core are you allowing to flow? 
How many heavy-feeling emotions are you experiencing frequently? 
What will it take for you to set them down?  
How much did this article resonate with you? 

I would love to hear your thoughts and feedback in the comments!

If this article resonated for you, please consider subscribing to my blog!  Subscription is FREE and includes hundreds of ideas to energize your life and step into thriving.